FateBreaker: Second Staff - Prologue Part 1

[Shad4c]

Ok, I'm back again. C&C welcome even if this is going up on FF.net as it is in a couple of hours. I've still got the next part to write after all.

More of a FukuFic first look as thanks for getting me back into writing again. Enjoy.


FateBreaker: Second Staff
[Book 1 of 3]
(Ramna ½ / Nanoha/A/StrikerS x-over)
by Shad4c

Disclaimer: Ranma ½ and Nanoha/A/StrikerS belong to their respective owners. Not me. This is purely done for entertainment purposes and no profit is made from it in any form.


Prologue Part 1
Going to Places…

A man in a battered Gi and a boy in similar attire stood in front of a gloomy cave entrance, they had been slogging through the seemingly endless forest that sheltered this place for almost a week in search of it. The boy could therefore be forgiven for being less then enthusiastic about the sight of the grand goal they had been working so hard to reach since they left civilisation behind.

“It’s a cave. Why did you drag me across that stupid forest for a cave!” The dark haired 10-year-old boy complained as he stabbed his finger at his father in anger.

The man scowled back at the boy before looking around at the surrounding forest landscape with more then mild suspicion. His well-developed danger sense had been going off at a low-level non-stop since they started to get close to the cave several hours ago. Normally he’d head in the opposite direction but this time the risk might just be worth it, besides it would be good training for the boy. Nothing had happened yet and this was too good a chance to pass up if that old man he’d got drunk in order to borrow his money, purely for the sake of his poor dear son Ranma, had been right about this. Now smiling widely Genma looked down at the boy.

“ Not the cave boy. What’s in the Cave! Something that can teach a martial artist a whole style lost to the world! Can you see the opportunity son! And I know its location!” The heavyset martial artist bragged to his son only to receive a somewhat sceptical look in return.

“ You’re sure about that Pops? This isn’t going to be another N-N-N-Neko-ken thing right? Or the time with the wind temple?” The young Saotome asked as he shuffled away from the suddenly more intimidating natural feature all the while splitting his attention between it and his grinning father.

“ Of course it is! Thrust me boy I’ve got the scars to make sure I don’t try that again. Ether of them.” The bolding martial artist said with confidence while mentally crossing his fingers, any sacrifice was worth it in the name of his retirement… and the Art of course.

Grabbing his son he physically tossed him into the cave and smiled smugly as the boy landed easily, tossing a glare back at him.

“ What was that!?” Ranma shouted at the overweight headache that he called Pops.

“ Training boy! If you can’t get it then your not worthy of it boy! Oh Woe is me, having such a weak girlie-boy for a son, afraid of the dark!” Genma bellowed over dramatically as he acted ashamed.

“ Fine! Stupid old man!” Ranma exclaimed as he scowled and turned his back on his father (who promptly started a victory dance) and the cave entrance itself, heading off into the dark interior. As he trekked deeper into the cave the voice of his father shouting insults and encouragement, along with demands that he pick up anything valuable that he found on the way, soon faded away into silence.

The cave twisted and turned as the young Saotome stumbled deeper into the unknown with only an old torch he’d swiped from Genma during one of his alcohol induced naps as a source of light in the gloom. After an hour of careful travelling in which he had accumulated an array of bumps, bruises and scrapes along with a battery of new names for the one who had sent him into this place. Around him the darkness was slowly being replaced by faint silvery glows.

Wary yet happy to be out of the suffocating darkness Ranma continued forward at a slightly faster pace. Glancing up at the rocky ceiling he could see a slowly increasing number of shining silver crystals which were the source of the much welcome lighting. Briefly considering climbing up and prying one of them loose he quickly discarded the idea. It was something that the Old Man would be happy about and since he’d chucked him in here, well Pops could just come in here and do it himself. Once again smiling with amusement at the though of what his father had lost out on he continued onwards.

The rest of his trip was quite short as a mere 10 minutes walk later, through a passage that became less and less natural and increasingly well lit as he advanced further along it, speeding his careful progress. The young Saotome finally came across a metal door at the end of the passageway.

Grasping what appeared to be a handle, Ranma turned it and pulled the door towards him. The door rattled slightly but otherwise made no indication of moving according to the younger Saotomes will. Groaning to himself Ranma tried pushing instead, this time the door groaned back as it shifted slightly.

“ Stupid door. Move!” The young martial artist said loudly as he put all his strength into moving the heavy old door.

Millimetre by millimetre the door swung open, stubbornly resisting all the way until it reached a half open state and suddenly seemed to give up the battle. Opening all the way it sent Ranma sprawling across the floor of the chamber beyond with a crash when he overbalanced because of the sudden loss of resistance.

Grumbling and cursing the existence of old door and bolding, lazy old men, Ranma picked himself up off the floor and dusted off the well-used Gi as best he could. Looking around he froze in moments at the sight presented to him by the new surroundings.

“What!?!” Ranma exclaimed.

The room was a sharp contrast to the passage or even the old door, brightly lit with metal walls, floor and ceiling. Metal pillars and strange dormant machinery was spaced out around the edges of the room and a strange metal bench sat in he centre of the chamber itself.

Slowly and very carefully creeping forward, Ranma approached the bench since it was by far the least threatening thing in the chamber to his eyes. Painful experience had taught the young boy that strange pillars or weird machines in a strange place generally meant a quick workout as the older member of the duo touched something he shouldn’t have. After the first four times running for your life from ancient traps he’d learned better, it got really annoying, really fast no matter how good it was as training.

Reaching the bench Ranma glanced around suspiciously and then took a closer look at the only two items resting on the otherwise empty surface in front of him, a small scroll and a blue pearl on a battered looking necklace. Circling the bench slowly, the younger Saotome checked it out from every angle. Once he was sure it wasn’t going to explode in his face or open a trap door into a pit of animated teddy bears (don’t ask, he really didn’t want to remember) he reached out and picked up both items.

“ Huh, piece of cake. This should get dome cool new training equipment if the old man doesn’t drink it away. Idiot.) Ranma said to himself as he raised the pearl to eye height and observed it in the silvery light.

A moment later the ground shook then a loud banging started coming from one of the larger pillars. Staring at the large dents rapidly forming it the tough looking material of the pillar Ranma gulped. Just then a mechanical arm blasted through the concealing material and began opening a larger hole in it. Wasting no time the pigtailed boy performed the Saotome Secret Technique and ran like all the worlds hungry cats were on his heels and someone had just dropped a bathtub of cat food on his head.

“ Damn you old man!” Ranma shouted as he ran back up the passage, the thumping sound of pursuit echoing behind him and lending his feet wings.

Re-tracing his path at a record setting pace the younger martial artist soon approached the caves exit. With freedom and another target for the metal thing to pound on in sight, Ranma poured on the speed and dived for the daylight…

To be continued



Authors Note-
Ok, I’m back but my muse for my existing stories has gone on vacation so I thought I’d try a new one to shake loose the writing gears. Don’t expect a narrative masterpiece here since I’m just trying to get back into the swing of things. Don’t have a Beta so volunteers willing to put up with an erratic writer are welcomed. See you in FateBreaker: Second Staff, Prologue Part 2. …You’d rather not be.

Bye

[Tovath]

This is an interesting start

“ Of course it is!

I think you mean of course it isn't

[Shad4c]

much appreciated, I'm correcting the FF.net version as these things are brought up.

[ToastedPine]

Of course it is! Thrust me boy I’ve got the scars to make sure I don’t try that again. Ether of them.”

>>Either

Once he was sure it wasn’t going to explode in his face or open a trap door into a pit of animated teddy bears (don’t ask, he really didn’t want to remember)

Narrator interjection is a no-no in most circles, and I think the line is needless.

“ Huh, piece of cake. This should get dome cool new training equipment if the old man doesn’t drink it away. Idiot.)

) = " maybe?

Not much to say about the story content. It simply promises a cross that I've wanted to read for a while. Keep up the work.

[Sky]

Looks interesting. I did a quick pass and had these comments:

Thrust me boy I’ve got the scars to make sure I don’t try that again.

Trust me boy, I've got the scars to make sure I don't try that again.

Grammar nit that I'm going to pick: Watch your capitalization. "Old Man" and "Pops" can be OK since it can be used as a name, but "What's in the Cave!" should not have 'cave' capitalized'.

[Shad4c]

Corrected in the FF.net version.

Your input is welcomed Sky and ToastedPine.

As to the story idea, well it something I've been wanting to read for a while too. Since I couldn't find a story already written which I could enjoy I thought that I might as well write it myself so I can go back and read it later.

[Shad4c]

I have to make a choice. I was orginally going to have chapter 1 jump to time of the start of the Ranma series and go from there. Re-watching the Nanoha series I came up with another Idea. To jump forward to the time of Ryouga and Ranmas first meeting.

My own preference goes neither way as I like them both. I ask here because the actions of Genma in Prologue part 2 are very different depending on the storyline chosen as book 1.

The question would be, which sounds more interesting?