Ranma no Zettai Kareshi 9 – Goodbye Kyouya, Hello Students

[Anchoku]

New chapter from Anchoku,

Title: Ranma no Zettai Kareshi

Category 1: Ranma
Category 2: Absolute Boyfriend

Character(s): Ranma


Chapter 9 Title: Goodbye Kyouya, Hello Students
Words: 9,540
Genre(s): Drama/Fantasy
Rating: Rated: M
Summary: Ranma/Absolute Boyfriend xover. Ranma beta-tests a prototype of the Lover Shop's Nightly Lover simulated boyfriend. Ch. 9 - Kyouya dies, strange announcements are made, Amazon logic runs amok

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4972965/9/


I just finished a last round of edits on this first section. Please point out anything I missed and drop a note on things you like, or don't like.

[PCHeintz72]

Chapter 9

“Thank you for calling me,” her father said in the most respectful tone she had ever heard from him.

Normally I really don't see Genma as this caring of Ranma's feelings... but at the same time, good enough groundword was laid in last chapter, I guess I can see it here.

Most other buildings had ceilings so low she was worried that turning into a man would result in bumping his head on door frames.

I can sympathize, despite living in America... I am tall, but my relatives are short, and I normally have to watch on clearance in some of thier homes due to things hanging from the cieling., like cieling fans for example.

“Statistically speaking, she couldn’t get any better, she’s not a normal person by any stretch of the imagination, and my head hurts and I don’t feel like arguing.”

I cannot really get into liking her from what little has been shown of her to this point. The main issue is exceptt he gender thing, I see little difference between her and the other finaces... That is to say, while she actually so far comes across as nice... all she seems to see in this possible relationship is how Ranma would be good for her, not what she can be good for Ranma.

It gave him a curse that was benign, almost beneficial given the number of people who’ll gush over a cute panda, but it gave his son a curse that put him in grave danger and was influencing his mind.

This is more how I would picture Genma reacting to this type of scenario...

Sounding panicked, Soun said, “It’s a special Tendo-ryu Musabetsu Kakutou meditation. No peeking until Akane has mastered it."

Normally... this would instatly raise red flags.

And don’t look under the tokonoma!

Might want to watch the use of Japanese. I had to look that one up.

He felt rather inadequate by comparison but was not at all sure of his parents’ standards.

At having heard what they just said... that is not how I would be feeling, unless he was being very sarcastic.

Akane growled, leaping to her feet, and clenched a fist. “You can’t do that,” she said, fiercely. “Ranma is my fiancée. If anyone’s going to take her to bed and do unmentionable things, it’s going to be me!”

Damn... where was that a few weeks earlier...

“Ah… I think I’ll get my stuff an’ leave for school, now.”

With the revelations of his mother and Akane, that is likely the only thing he could have done.

However, I should note that I feel this exceptionally bad timing.

“Hooeeee! Things sure are getting interesting! Someone’s going to get a taste of that fine piece of ass soon.”

I agree with Nabiki, but am curious as to just which one he was referring to.

“The old monkey said the only way to break Saotome’s perverted attraction to me was to dress up as a woman.”

Thanks... that is I believe the funniest line I've read in the last day.

Nabiki hurried after him, anxious to offer her services as guide and host.

I would have thought this would give even her pause before rushing in to be part of the madness.

The entire class, without exception, paused in their eating and conversations to stare at their table.

Damn... that is one runor that he will never be able to get rid of... Some things once spoken simply cannot be undone.

I'll get to the other two as soon as I can. I'm trying to clear out my backlog from the last couple days. I'm down to the two chapters of this, and the new chapter of 'Her War' by Materia Blade.

[Anchoku]

I cannot really get into liking her from what little has been shown of her to this point. The main issue is exceptt he gender thing, I see little difference between her and the other finaces... That is to say, while she actually so far comes across as nice... all she seems to see in this possible relationship is how Ranma would be good for her, not what she can be good for Ranma.

Chapter 12 focuses almost entirely on development of the Shimeru characters and the relationship between Baimei and Ranma. I hope it is more to your satisfaction.

Thank you for the comments. I will be trying to complete the fic very soon and, hopefully, get time to go back and refine the chapters. I know the earlier chapters need some work because the tone and style has changed so much. The Shimeru chapters have little to do with Absolute Boyfriend except that Ranma finds a replacement for Kyouya (s)he likes even better.