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Return to Zero: A Fate/Stay Night Fanfic Idea

PostPosted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 1:21 pm
by Comartemis
It is the closing phase of Heaven's Feel, and Emiya Shirou is on the brink of death. Having defeated Black Saber, freed Sakura from the grip of Angra Mainyu, and outlasted Kotomine in their final showdown, there is just enough energy left in his body to project Excalibur and obliterate the Holy Grail. However before he can do this, he is stopped by Ilya, who sacrifices herself using the Third Magic on him and transfering his soul into her body (The cavern the Grail is housed in collapses soon afterwards, destroying the Grail anyways). Thus Emilya Shirou is born, and returns to Sakura and the gang alive and well, if also turned into a ten year old girl.

However what should have been a happy ending is interrupted several months later by the sudden appearance of multiple Dead Apostles (Nasuverse vampires, for those not familiar with Tsukihime) in Fuyuki City. Drawn by the residual power of the completed Black Grail, at least one Dead Apostle Ancestor--perhaps Nero Chaos or Altrouge Brunstud--shows up in Fuyuki and begins wrecking havoc. Emilya, Rin, and Rider go into action against the vampires, but before the final battle is over, Sakura has been captured and placed in mortal danger, and Emilya is forced to make a pact with the world as Archer did in order to gain the power to save Sakura from enemies of vastly superior power. This she accomplishes, but at the cost of her life. So it goes that Emiya Shirou becomes Counter Guardian EMILYA.

Now rewind the clock eleven years back.

Kariya Matou is the only decent human being left in the Matou family. He is Shinji's father and Zouken's descendent, and is the last magus in the Matou family, the last family member with the hope of restoring the family's power. However at a young age he decided he wanted nothing to do with Zouken or the family's foul magecraft, and left the family to its' fate. Now the Fourth Holy Grail War is right around the corner, and Kariya has just learned that the daughter of his beloved Tohsaka Aoi, Tohsaka Sakura, has become trapped in Zouken's vile plans for the family's resurrection through a deal with Tohsaka Tokiome, Aoi's husband.

Having no desire for young Sakura to suffer at Zouken's hands, Kariya offers Zouken a deal; if Kariya participates in the Fourth Grail War as Zouken originally wanted him to, and Kariya wins, then Zouken will agree to release Sakura back to her true family. Zouken accepts this deal, but because Kariya has not had training as a magus, Kariya will have to become a host for Zouken's crest worms to augment his power and become capable of using magecraft and summoning a servant.

When Kariya summons his servant, Zouken instructs him to summon a Berserker-class, a wrecking ball suitable for smashing through anything that may get in his way. In the original Fourth Grail War and the events of Fate/Zero, Kariya summoned Lancelot as a Berserker and lasted most of the war before being defeated in the final stages when the crest worms consumed all his prana and his life.

This time, however, while going through the motions of the summoning procedure, Kariya's thoughts are occupied by the inevitable fates of Aoi and Sakura, and his summoning is marked by a wish, one that repeats itself over and over in his head like a mantra:

...Save Sakura...

...Save Sakura...

...SAVE SAKURA....!!

There is a flash of light, a roar of wind, and the surprised yelp of a little girl dropped unceremoniously on her ass in Kariya's summoning circle. His heart drops into his stomach as he beholds his "servant"; a little girl with pink hair dressed in a cute schoolgirl's uniform. He doesn't even need to think about it too hard to realize he's failed; there are no Heroic Spirits at that age, and certainly none that would be wearing a modern-day primary school seifuku. He must have botched the summoning and produced some sort of familiar...

...although, it's a rather strange familiar that comes equipped with a stone ax four times her size....

Kariya has summoned Counter Guardian EMILYA as Servant Berserker, the only Servant Class besides Saber that Emilya would qualify for due to her unstoppable determinator behavior when her loved ones are in danger. Unlike Herakles, Emilya is not constantly insane thanks to one of her Noble Phantasms, which allows her to suppress the Mad Enhancement and function normally until she needs ME's stat boost in battle. This is very good news for Kariya, as it means that Emilya is much easier to maintain most of the time than Lancelot would have been, and his prospects as a Master have just risen considerably, though he doesn't know it yet because he doesn't believe he's actually summoned a Servant.

For her part, Emilya is thrilled at the prospect of having the chance to save Sakura before she ever suffered under Zouken's treatment, but in order to accomplish this he has to claim the tainted Grail in Zouken's name, something he absolutely will not do under any circumstances, knowing as he does that wishing on the Grail will result in total destruction of the human race. Caught between a rock and a hard place, Emilya and Kariya struggle to find a way to save Sakura from Zouken while also stopping the other Masters from claiming the Holy Grail and dooming humanity. Kiritsugu, Saber, and Irisviel may be of assistance with this, but there's no guaranteeing that the Magus Killer will trust them enough to not shoot Kariya on sight, and Saber is too focused on claiming the Grail and reversing her past to open her mind to Emilya's warnings.

However, regardless of the consequences Emilya is determined to find a way to save Sakura one more time. Preserving her smile is the only reason she exists anymore, and nothing and no-one will stop her from achieving that goal. Not Kiritsugu, not Saber, not Kotomine, not Gilgamesh, and especially not Zouken.

Look out world, there's a new anti-heroine on the block!

PostPosted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 2:27 pm
by Jomasten
Hmm, good premise, nice delivery, great presentation. The idea interests me, as well.

...I APPROVE!

I wonder though; is there anyway that this might come and bite Emilya in the patookie later on? I forget, though, but does Emilya bear some semblance to Ilya? Because it would be intriguing to see her interactions with Irisviel, as well as said lady's reaction.

Other than that, would other Nasuverse characters appear, or were the Dead Apostles just some sort of Tsukihime mention/cameo?

PostPosted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 2:46 pm
by Comartemis
Well Emilya's body doesn't seem to have the shortened lifespan that Ilya's body possessed (she only had a year to live after the Grail War whether she won or not) because a shortened lifespan never came up in the comics so far as I know, so I don't think merging with Ilya would have any adverse effects on her besides turning Shirou into an adorable loli (which is probably one heck of a drawback by his reckoning, but by the time he's been summoned he'll have gotten over it).

Emilya does resemble Ilya, but there are enough differences that I'm not sure Iris would recognize her immediately. She would definitely recognize the body of an Einzbern homunculus, though, if she got the chance to examine Emilya up close.

The Dead Apostles are just there for background flavor and to create a reason for Emilya to have to become a Counter Guardian; they won't be showing up in the story except maybe in flashbacks to Emilya's life. Apart from that, there's no reason for the Tsukihime characters to show up. I wish I could create an excuse for Aoko to make an appearance, but if the original Grail War didn't attract her attention then I don't see why Emilya's participation would change that.

So no, probably no characters from outside FSN and F/Z will be showing up in this fic, unless things got so bad that Gaia dispatches Arcueid as a Counter Guardian to obliterate the Grail and all the participants. I doubt that'll happen, though, since Gaia apparently didn't care about the Grail's awakening during FSN or the original Fate/Zero.

PostPosted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 4:53 pm
by Knight of L-sama
Tiny nitpick but I'm pretty sure that Fate Stay/Night is set sometime after Tsukihime even if they don't intersect all that much, so odds are Nvnsqr is very, very dead. At least if you use the Near Side of the Moon arcs.

Though given how the Church is at least an overseer in the Grail Wars Dead Apostles showing up (well other than Zeltrech) you'd expect at least of couple of Burial Agents to show up.

PostPosted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 5:34 pm
by Kilich
As far as I know from Beast's Lair forum, Tsukihime set in a slightly different reality\dimension than FSN\KnK. For example, in FSN\KnKverse, Arcuied doesn't exist.

Also, was this story inspired by 'Magical Girl Berserko' doujinshi by any chance?

PostPosted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 5:56 pm
by Comartemis
Kilich wrote:As far as I know from Beast's Lair forum, Tsukihime set in a slightly different reality\dimension than FSN\KnK. For example, in FSN\KnKverse, Arcuied doesn't exist.

I don't know where you would have gotten that idea. I know KnK and Tsukihime supposedly take place in different universes because the two Shikis' eyes work differently and supposedly there can only be one set of Mystic Eyes of Death Perception at once (though it's only a matter of astronomical chances, and so technically is possible but also extremely unlikely), but as far as I know there's no reason to think Tsukihime and FSN don't take place in the same universe. I'd cite Zelretch's appearance in Heaven's Feel as evidence, except he seems to make a point of wandering around and not staying in any one universe for very long.

Also, was this story inspired by 'Magical Girl Berserko' doujinshi by any chance?

Nope, never heard of that one. This is actually inspired by a darkfic idea that got posted on Beast's Lair where Kariya summons Dark Sakura as an Avenger-class. Putting Emilya in there is just a little added fun; I mean, who doesn't want to see Gilgamesh have his ass handed to him by a ten year old?

Tiny nitpick but I'm pretty sure that Fate Stay/Night is set sometime after Tsukihime even if they don't intersect all that much, so odds are Nvnsqr is very, very dead. At least if you use the Near Side of the Moon arcs.

Might be, might not be. The TATARI might be more suitable for this instance, since after having Dark Sakura going around slaughtering hundreds of people there'd be an awful lot of rumors about phantom killers and people disappearing out of their beds, don't you think?

Though given how the Church is at least an overseer in the Grail Wars Dead Apostles showing up (well other than Zeltrech) you'd expect at least of couple of Burial Agents to show up.

Considering who exactly the overseer in this particular Grail War was, I don't think it's a sure thing that Kotomine would have reported Dead Apostles showing up in Fuyuki, even if he was still around to do anything about it.

Re: Return to Zero: A Fate/Stay Night Fanfic Idea

PostPosted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 8:26 pm
by spooky316
Hmm, pink hair and a huge ax... did you happen to be influenced by Tales of Symphonia at all? :D

PostPosted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 8:29 pm
by Comartemis
Nope, the pink hair is from Emilya's appearance in the Heaven's Failure doujin and the ax is Herakles's stone ax, the one Shirou used with Nine Lives Blade Works in Heaven's Feel.

PostPosted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 11:43 pm
by Jomasten
Comartemis wrote:Nope, the pink hair is from Emilya's appearance in the Heaven's Failure doujin and the ax is Herakles's stone ax, the one Shirou used with Nine Lives Blade Works in Heaven's Feel.


Eh, details, details. Considering I also just noticed the reference, spooky's comment seemed to have Omake potential.

Ignoring the canon Nasuverse timeline, could the Dead Apostle also be Roa? It seems suspect, and given the 'powers' of the Grail, it seems logical (and rather cliche) that he would be attracted to its powers.

Of course, TATARI also seems to be a good idea.

PostPosted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 12:42 am
by Comartemis
Eh, Roa never struck me as a serious threat to anyone who wasn't an ordinary human, at least as he appeared in Tsukihime. He might've been more dangerous back in his prime, but he never seems to actually do anything besides regenerate that Rider or Rin and Shirou together wouldn't be able to handle. Of course, I've only played through Arc's route so far so I'm probably missing out on something major here.

PostPosted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 1:37 am
by Jomasten
And given that he reincarnated inside true SHIKI, he gains powers and abilities that Shiki Tohno has, as well as skill close to comparable to Nanaya, if my knowledge of Tsukihime is accurate enough.

PostPosted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 1:43 am
by Comartemis
I can tell you right off the bat that Roa does NOT have the Mystic Eyes of Death Perception. Roa's eyes can see life force because he's reincarnated so many times, now he can cut people and drain their energy from them. Shiki's eyes see death. When he cuts things, they stop existing. In Shiki's own words, "What you see and what I see are completely different things."

And if he had Nanaya's combat skills on top of whatever magic he's reputed to have and his enhanced physical characteristics and regeneration, I doubt Arc would have been able to kill him once, let alone however many times she's killed him in the past.

PostPosted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 2:12 am
by Muramasa
Altrouge would massacre team Emilya.

First, she's one of the few characters shown to have defeated Arcuied who at 30% of her complete potential is said to be as strong as two servants. That's straight out of Nasu's mouth.

Plus she doesn't have Arc's restrictions on her blood lust so she can definitely tap into more than 30% of her strength.

Second, where ever Altrouge goes PRIMATE MURDER is sure to follow.

That... that's just overkill.

Tatari also probably wouldn't be the best idea since he can't be killed without a crimson moon over his head restoring him to a corporal being.

Nero would be just as unkillable. Actually for the record I recall reading somewhere that Nero even managed to defeat Altrouge once. Whatever beasts team Emilya managed to kill from his soil of genesis would just be reabsorbed and spammed until whatever opposition he had against him died. Shiki gets around it thanks to his mystic eyes but Team Emilya doesn't have that advantage.

In order to defeat Nero, you would have to kill all 666 of his beasts AT ONCE. Otherwise it's as if you didn't hurt him at all. On top of that, some of Nero's monsters are on the level of Divine Beasts (Such as Pegasus).

Kariya Matou is the only decent human being left in the Matou family. He is Shinji's father and Zouken's descendent,


I'm fairly certain Kariya isn't Shinji's father.

Having no desire for young Sakura to suffer at Zouken's hands...


It's very likely that Sakura has already been infested with worms at this point. If not Kariya's solution is simple. Simply order Emilya *Using a command seal if neccessary* to kill Zouken. Problem solved.


EDIT: May I offer a suggestion? Instead of Dead Apostles, why don't you use the Church instead? Their line of work involves destroying heretics and I think Sakura definitely applies.

However what if the church found out about her connection to the grail? Or to be more exact what if they found out that she is a conduit of the grail and a near infinite source of prana?

What if that energy could be used in the creation of a new conceptual weapon? (In example, the Seventh Holy Scripture?)

PostPosted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 1:37 pm
by Comartemis
Muramasa wrote:Second, where ever Altrouge goes PRIMATE MURDER is sure to follow.

AND Strout AND Svelten, come to think of it. You're right, Al is pretty much the Big Bad of the whole Nasuverse, you'd need a major crossover alliance between the FSN and Tsukihime crews to even think of fighting with her seriously.

It's very likely that Sakura has already been infested with worms at this point. If not Kariya's solution is simple. Simply order Emilya *Using a command seal if neccessary* to kill Zouken. Problem solved.

Yeah, Sakura's hair has already started to change color by the time the Fourth War opens up, so she already has the worms swimming in her blood.

Would Rule Breaker kill the worms or boot them out of Sakura's nervous system, or is that only possible with Angra Mainyu and Dark Sakura?

May I offer a suggestion? Instead of Dead Apostles, why don't you use the Church instead? Their line of work involves destroying heretics and I think Sakura definitely applies.

However what if the church found out about her connection to the grail? Or to be more exact what if they found out that she is a conduit of the grail and a near infinite source of prana?

What if that energy could be used in the creation of a new conceptual weapon? (In example, the Seventh Holy Scripture?)

Oh that is diabolical. Excellent idea, Mura.

PostPosted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 3:55 pm
by Jomasten
Muramasa wrote:In order to defeat Nero, you would have to kill all 666 of his beasts AT ONCE. Otherwise it's as if you didn't hurt him at all. On top of that, some of Nero's monsters are on the level of Divine Beasts (Such as Pegasus).


Hmm, can Nero withstand a full-out UBW or Excalibur, then? Could Nero resist an Anti-World type Noble Phantasm, for the matter?

Comartemis wrote:
Muramasa wrote:Second, where ever Altrouge goes PRIMATE MURDER is sure to follow.

AND Strout AND Svelten, come to think of it. You're right, Al is pretty much the Big Bad of the whole Nasuverse, you'd need a major crossover alliance between the FSN and Tsukihime crews to even think of fighting with her seriously.


Urgh! Must. Resist. Want. To. Download. Battle. Moon. Wars!