Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

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Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby Vahn » Sun Jan 25, 2015 12:10 pm

Once more this is the rough draft before the clean up, the adding, the tweaking the subtracting of scene. Does it work. You know the drill.

Homo Superior

Supremacy: Part Three

"There is a war coming Saotome, you best prepare for it."

"Ain't my war."


**** Xavier Institute ****

He saw the female before him again yet could not move toward her to claim her. Something was holding him back. 'It' was holding him back. Unlike the other time when he could move freely after it was gone, it felt as if it was moving in muddy water for these past few times it has been awaken. Looking at the golden one before him, he let out a low growl to let her know that she would be selected as his mate. The golden one seem to turn red for a second before backing away from him.

'Ranma now, slowly assert your control over it.'

He looked tried to turn to where the voices originated from yet, he could not. 'It was interfering again, it was trying to exert it's dominance. No he was the dominant one here, not it!

'Come on Ranma, almost there, focus. You're almost their, the cat is almost suppress. No don't turn away from Sybil keep your eyes on her.'

He let out a hiss of frustration as he could feel 'it pushing it back into the cage again. Immediately he attacked the other presence sinking his claw into it.

'Don't panic Ranma, it's just an attack, you have suffer attacks before, calm your mind and think of it as another attack, push it back into the cage.'

He was losing ground, 'it' was pushing him back through the hated cage!

"S-shut th-the damn c-cage!" Ranma hoarsely ordered as he fell to his knees and keep himself from completely collapsing with the support of his arms.

For a moment there was only the sound of the pig tailed boy as Jean Grey and Sybil look on as the boy slowly calmed himself. The shivering subsided slowly.

"Are you okay Ranma?" Jean asked as she felt enough time have passed and went over by his side.

"Y-yeah," Ranma exhale slowly as his senses came back to him. A few moments later he rose to his feet and wiped the sweat from his head and sat down on the little therapy couch that was in Jean office.

"You made excellent progress," Jean spoke up clinically as she made handed Ranma a bottle of water. The boy took it from her and drank it all down. "I think we have reached another step in your treatment."

"Ye-yeah..." Ranma glanced over at his psychiatrist and smiled. "Still hard though, and I almost... lost."

"But you didn't," Jean soothe as she went back to her desk and started to scribble some notes in Ranma portfolio. "And that is a big step."

"If you say so doc," Ranma smirked and saw Jean rolled her eyes at his nickname for her while they have a session together.

Looking up he saw that Sybil had sat down in the chair across the room looking at him with concern. "Thanks again for taking the time out to help me with my... problem."

Sybil gave a soft comforting smiled and shook her head. "It's no problem at all. I'm glad I can help."

She had been surprised when Jean asked her to volunteer to assist Ranma with what she called his 'Cat therapy'. After signing a confidentiality agreement, she disclose the full nature of Ranma's problem. It horrified her that a parent could do such a thing to their child. After agreeing, she had expected many things, from a crazy Ranma acting like a cat to pure fear of seeing her. She did not realize that there seem to be an actual cat personality inside of Ranma himself.

Ranma did not merely have a psychotic break from the stress, another personality subsumed his and was another living breathing entity with it own wants and desire. Blushing a bit she realized that it had made it's intention very clear what he desired.

After a few minutes of respectful silence on Ranma part to get himself composed he turned to look at his counselor and asked her a question that been weighting on his mind. "Not that I don't appreciate ya taking the time out to continue the treatment but wouldn't ya rather be out there supporting Xavier school? You're like tied right?"

Jean shook her head and gave a smile. "This is a more serious matter then some games. Last week we had to cancel because of my meetings with the sponsors, now that everything is done, we can continue with more the more important matter."

Ranma turned to look at Sybil. "And don't you have a mock team battle coming up with the young brotherhood?"

Sybil smiled back at Ranma. "Sitting here is hardly taxing and that particular event is not for another hour. I'm as ready as I'll ever be and that's even if they need me."

"I guess," Ranma shrugged but felt grateful. His treatment with Jean had been a life saver, according to Jean, they built a shutter type dam inside his mind that enable them to control his fe- distaste of cats. Jean had suggested that if Ranma could humanized cats in his mind he wouldn't be so afraid, and that was where Sybil came in. Sybil had a human face though with cat like feature seem easier for Ranma to handle then a real live cat. It had been initially tough finding the right amount of shutters to open in his mind for enough fear of cats to seep through that would make him freeze up but not loose all sense of reason.

"You can go Sybil, Good luck on the event!" Jean thanked the sweet girl, who had shot Ranma a final encouraging look before leaving.

"What's the score now?" Ranma asked after a few more moments of silence. He saw Jean tapped a few keys on the computer in front of her and frown.

"3-7, Genosha, only 4 minutes left in regulation," Jean winced looking at the status and update on the hockey game that was currently being played. Today was the fourth day of the games and so far they have been deadlocks in the 'Power Games' competition. The only sport left was Football than Soccer, the former being played today, the later tomorrow. If they lose the hockey game, then Genosha will be ahead by one. Which mean they must win the Soccer game to tie it. While there was a mock team battle that later today also, it was not going to count. It was billed more as a 'friendly' match set up by Logan and Creed, pitting their X-men in training against the Young Brotherhood.

"Ouch," Ranma sympathized. He had only bothered showing up for Myst volleyball match and Evan's basketball game. It had ended both with their victories, even as a spectator, Ranma Saotome and by extension his friends, doesn't lose. He had to smirk at that thought.

"Anything else on your mind?" Jean asked as she finished making the final notation on Ranma's file.

"Nah," Ranma waved off. "So tomorrow's the final day huh?"

"Yeah," Jean nodded and exhaled in relief. "I have to say I'll be happy when all of these 'sponsors' and news crew leave the Institute so we can continue teaching."

"Yeah... I bet," Ranma smirked thinking about how happy the students had been with no school for an entire week. The festivities outside had consumed all their time and thoughts.

"Speaking of the final day," Jean tone change putting Ranma on alert for some reason. "You got a date for the dance yet?"

"Yeah Akane's my date," Ranma said easily and he saw Jean nodded in approval.

"Well I'm glad you asked her out," Jean praised before she eye Ranma mode of dress critically. For some inexplicable reason, he was wearing the ugliest orange shirt in existence couple with his black pants. "Do you any formal wear? I have to admit other than the issued gym clothes, I never seen much variation from your wardrobe."

"Errr," Ranma sweated a bit. "Hah, errr, sorta?"

"Well you do have a little stipend from your scholarship," Jean pointed out. "Maybe you can go get something to wear that matches what Akane would be wearing."

"Hmm," Ranma pondered in deep thought. "I guess I could..."

"Trust me," Jean spoke up with the wisdom of women through he ages. "She'll be thrill if you wear something that compliment her dress."

"I guess I'll ask her," Ranma nodded before he looked over at his counselor. "You don't think you can use your mind magic to find where she's at for me do ya? I mean it's is pretty crowded outside."

Jean raised an eyebrow at Ranma before closing her eyes to do as he bumblingly requested. A few moment later she opened her eyes back up. "She's with Rogue and Noriko by the gym helping to put up the decorations."

"Thanks Jean!" Ranma waved as he ran out of the door. Looking for his finacee.

++++Gym++++

The Gym had been converted to an impromptu dance hall the moment the dance itself had been announced. For those student who did not sign up for any competition, they decided to help with the dance instead. Already the ceiling had been painted black while shiny stars light things were being put on it to give it a nice ambiance. On the floor itself were many students working to get all the lightnings fixture set up, while others were cutting elegantly designed word, no doubt for a banner of some sort.

Normally something like this might have taken longer had the student been normal. However many powers were on displayed that help speed up the process. The strength type helped to carried the heavy equipment while the diverse flying students all painted the ceiling. It was almost surreal to Ranma as he walked in and observed anything. Of course, he knew what they were doing and Anything Goes Decoration was similar but he never did get the artistic flare down.

He took in the students and made out Akane and Rogue decorating a banner by hand. "Hey Akane!" Ranma greeted as he walked up to his fiancee.

Akane hearing the sound of Ranma voice looked up as if startled. "Ranma." she greeted neutrally.

Ranma frowned at her tone. It's been over a week now since their park incident. He had assume she would have gotten over it by now. Seeing her friend look at him he felt a bit uncomfortable. "Hey, err, mind if we talk... alone?"

"I'm gotta be over there Kane," Rogue waved to her friend and took a girl with dragonfly wings with her to a wide distance.

"Ranma," Akane began and looked at the pig-tailed boy. "Wh- um, what's going on?"

Ranma didn't know why but Akane seem to be a bit uncomfortable with him, there appeared to be still traced of anger and sadness when he looked into her eyes. "Well... umm... about the dance."

Akane looked started and stared at the pig-tailed boy as if something new had just occurred to her. "A-are you asking me to the dance?"

"Ye- yeah?" Ranma asked hesitantly before steeling himself. "I mean yeah."

However it was Akane who appeared to look uncomfortable. "R-ranma...I didn't think you'd want to go... I... accepted someone else invitation already."

Ranma felt as if he was punched in the gut. "What?"

Akane however looked sadly at Ranma. "I waited for three days before accepting Icarus invitation... You... you never said you wanted too... not even a note."

"Wh- I mean... You... you're my fiancee... isn't it a given we were gonna go together?" Ranma asked feeling as if the wind was knocked out of him. Which was funny cause he hadn't fought anyone at all.

"Given?" Akane asked this time and her eyes narrowed dangerously. "If you don't ask me how would I know what you want, oh wait, that's right, you just assume things were going to happen your way."


"What?" Ranma asked looking at his fiancee, getting angry. "Are you still made about the park thing?"

Akane look like she had been slap before schooling her face. "The 'park thing'? That was what you call our serious discussion, the 'park thing' ?"

"Well what else would it be?" Ranma felt even more agitated. "You asked me all these weird question and act like I did something wrong when you were the one that accepted someone else invitation to the dance."

"Ranma," Akane felt a headache coming on before looking at her fiancee. "Did you want to go to the dance with me or assume that because we were fiancee we were going to go together?"

Taken off guard Ranma nervously scratched the back of his head. "I dunno? Both?"

"Ranma, if we weren't engage-" Akane began as she looked into Ranma eyes. "Would you have bother to asked me out to the dance?"

"What the hell Akane?" Ranma said before lowering his voice and staring at his tomboy fiancee. "What do you WANT from me?"

"A better question to asked Ranma is what do you want from ME," Akane shot back slightly raising her voice. "First you tell me you only married me out of obligation, then you made it pretty clear that you never wanted our engagement in the first place, so pray tell why should I think you'd want to go to the dance with me?"

"What does that has to do with anything?" Ranma asked in confusion.

"It has to do with everything Ranma!" Akane quickly lower her voice after the last shout. "Ranma you don't even know what you want so how am I suppose to know?"

"How can I know what I want when everything has been decided for me?" Ranma shot back folding his arms as he did so. "I'm just trying to make the best out of a bad situation."

The moment he uttered those words he knew that he had went to far.

"Wait, Akane, I didn't mean for-"

"Shut up," Akane spoke up, her eyes starting to tear up as she glared at him. "If that is how you really feel then our engagement is over."

Despite how bad he felt, hearing the last line lit a spark in him. "Our engagement is over? OUR engagement is over? You always do this whenever you get angry. Always threatening to end the engagement because things' don't go your way!"

Akane glared at Ranma. "Well I am sorry if you were stuck with someone you had to 'grew' to like, what a chore!"

"You damn right it was a chore!" Ranma fired back mercilessly. "You think I like getting hit and accuse of crap I didn't do? You think I even wanted an engagement at all?!"

"Well you don't have to worry about me any more Ranma," Akane hissed, too angry for tears now. "I am fine on my own now, I don't need the great Ranma Saotome anymore."

The two knew that the words were cutting too deeply, too close to home but neither seem to be able to stop.

"Well that's great," Ranma shot back. "Cause I never needed you in the first place!"

Akane looked at Ranma and slowly her glare faded, her feature soften. "Goodbye Ranma." she whispered softly and walked off to her concern looking friends leaving Ranma to stand there looking at her.

The students who had discreetly try to pretend not to have heard worked at a more concentrated pace.

"Goddamnit." Ranma growled as he stalked out of the gym his mind running a mile a minute.

+++ School Grounds+++

How long he wander for Ranma didn't know, in the distance he could hear the roar of the cheering crowds and a man announcing something he could barely make out over the P.A. He must have been closer to the forest in the estates giving him some much needed time alone.

"FUCK!!!!" Ranma shouted as he punched his arm through a thick tree trunk. His anger and frustration was palatable. He wish Ryoga would show up because he really could do with a fight right about now.

"Ranma?"

Ranma turned around to see a wide eye Celeste dressed in the red and yellow outfit, looking at him and the arm that had effortlessly punched through the tree trunk. He didn't know why but he didn't need her attitude right about now. To his ever growing ire, the irritating blonde apparently was moving closer to him.

"Is everything okay?" the leader of the Cuckoo's asked in a concern voice looking at where Ranma had hit the tree. "Is your arm going to be alright?"

Taken aback by the softness of her tone, Ranma anger deflated, his mood turning sullen. "It'll be fine." He raised his arms up to show that it was indeed uninjured.

"I don't need to be a telepath to know that something bad happened," Celeste slowly approached the now sullen pig-tailed boy.

"Unless one of your powers is turning back time," Ranma turned to look at the blonde girl before letting his back fall back against the tree. "I believe I am shit outta luck."

"Well," Celeste said as she finally closed the distance between her and the boy. "We can erase memories so that is sort of going back in time."

Ranma looked up sharply and felt alarmed at THAT possibility. "Y-You can?"

"Well, not by myself, but we can," Celeste corrected. Gently she reached out her hand to feel if his arms was broken. She did take some first aid course as was required.

Ranma didn't pull back and let the girl do what she wanted. After all he did grabbed her arm rudely that one time so pay back was fair. Looking at the way she was dressed he saw her had a backpack of a sort slung over her shoulders.

"Going on a training trip?" He joked.

Satisfied that nothing was broken, Celeste pulled her hand back and looked at the pigtailed boy. She knew there had to be a secret to his powers but Ms. Grey had impressed upon Ms. Frost that she would not brook any unauthorized scan of Ranma mind from fellow students. Seeing as how Ms. Frost literally owe Ms. Grey for not making a bigger issue with her and Mr. Summers. Ms. Frost had strictly prohibited them from doing anything mentally to the pigtailed boy.

"Not at all, this is our regular clothes, we're going shopping after the mock battle."

"Oh." Ranma said looking at the duffel bag behind her.

"Hellion asked us to the dance," Celeste said a bit excitedly. "We figured we need better dresses."

Ranma ire grew at the mention of the dance but decided not to take it on on the blonde who was being unusually nice. "Well I am sure you girls would look good in anything."

Celeste didn't know why but she blushed a bit at that, it was true she knew she was good looking. Everyone knew it, it was a fact. Yet Ranma had never really given or praise any of the girls. In fact he never tried to flirt, did not care how they came to him dressed, never looked at them with perverted eyes. Frankly they thought he was gay, until they found out about his engagement with Akane Tendo.

If there was ever a worse fiancee she didn't know... okay maybe there was Mr. Summer. However Akane was close. Celeste briefly recalled a fight between Ranma and the rock mutant known as Ryoga. The Ryoga mutant had jumped Ranma out of the blue accusing him of flirting with them while cheating on Akane. The girls had wanted to shut off the Rock mutant but to their surprise Ranma handled the Ryoga with ease culminating him in humiliating the rock boy, much to their amusement. That was when the super bitch Fiancee showed up and without even getting the story straight, defended Ryoga and accuse Ranma of all people of bullying someone weaker. When Ranma defended himself and baited the rock boy, taunting him, he was slugged by his finacee.

That didn't sit right with the Cuckoo's at all. Unfortunately, Ms. Frost gave strict order not to mess with other student even permanently. Ranma did not seem to mind it and so they let the matter dropped but they never were fond of the Japanese girl.

Shaking her head at the bad memory Celeste was able to recover from her blush. "Of course we do." she replied haughtily.

"And you're back," Ranma grinned as he looked at the girl. "Was wondering where the real you went."

"This is the real me," Celeste said flatly glaring at Ranma which only seem to make the boy grinned wider.

"Well, enjoy your dance," Ranma waved before he began to walk away with a much clearer head and less aggression. He hate to admit it but he had to thank that Cuckoo's leader for taking his mind off of Akane.

"Aren't you going?" Celeste asked Ranma as he left. Her only reply was a shake of Ranma head as he walked back toward the dormitory.

+++Main Building+++

After leaving Celeste behind Ranma found himself at the main building wondering if he should tell Jean about what had happen with him and Akane. He didn't want to prove his father right by being a whiner, bad enough as it was that he changed into a girl.

"Ranma?" Evan who had been on his way to asked for special permission to leave the campus ground spotted his friend.

"Oh hey, Spyke," Ranma shook out of his revere greeted his friend.

"You trying to get special permission to leave the school too?" Spyke asked as he opened the door and felt Ranma followed.

"You need permission to leave the school?" Ranma expression showing his ignorance in such a matter.

"Y..you didn't get one?" Evan looked at his friend. "You could have gotten into so much trouble! How did you get pass the gate alarm and the forest security?

"... what security?" Ranma inquired and saw his friend do a face fault, something the boy learned from him. He couldn't help but be proud of that.

"The one in the forest! The laser beams, the electrical shocks.. you know, traps and wire!" Evan rattled off and saw his friend face finally took on an understanding tone.

"Oh those!" Ranma chuckled as he remembered. "Those are pretty good training tools, good for the reflexes."

Evan open his mouth and was about to say something when he stopped. "You know what, never mind."

"So what you need special permission for?" Ranma asked curiously as he followed Spyke to Jean's office.

"Well, I found out that the suit I had no longer fit me, Auntie Ro told me I should buy an outfit before it's too late," Evan declared worriedly. "I hope it's not too late, Ariana finally said yes!"

"Ariana?" Ranma asked not remembering anyone with that name.

"Oh, she's from Genosha, and she's hot!" Evan gloated to his friend.

"Oh, you doing that cultural thingy," Ranma remembered Jean speech about unity and all that other stuff.

"Well yeah," Evan nodded. "They might be mutant supremacist but they sure produce some good looking talent, have you seen Polaris?"

"I...don't know who's who," Ranma sweated, with all these code names and double names around it was hard for him to keep track of them.

"Ah, you'll get use to it, I mean Polaris has legs that would give Ms. Psylo- oh."

Ranma looked up to why his friend stop when lo and behold the Ninja assassin was there talking with Jean in front of her office.

"Ms. Grey, Ms. Braddock," Evan greeted as politely as possible.

"Evan, Ranma," Pyslocke greeted and saw the expression on Evan face looking to her friend. "I'll see you later Jean."

Jean waved to her friend and turned to the boys. "And what can I help you two with?"

"Just him," Ranma quickly pointed to Evan. "He needs permission to go out and buy a suit."

"At least someone ask for permission," Jean mumbled softly under her breath as she walked into her office and grab some tracker bands. Or would have if she had any left. "Oh no, I gave it to the Genosha kids."

"Awww man!" Evan panicked. "How am I going to get a suit in time now?"

Ranma looked at his friend and decided to be a 'bro'. "I could always help you get pass the obstacle, no biggie..."

"Absolutely not!" Jean injected right again cutting off a hopeful looking Evan. "You said you needed to buy a suit?"

"Yes Ms. Grey," Evan dejectedly reply as he thought about the perfection that was his date.

"Well it just so happens the kids from Genosha, and the Cuckoo's along with Beak are going shopping too, they also needed to get some last minute formal wear."

"I can tag along?!" Evan asked hopefully.

"Yes, Kitty say she'd supervise with how many trackers we got out and about," Jean grinned and saw Evan jumping for joy. "It would of course be after the Mock battle."

"Thank you Ms. Grey!!!" Evan hugged the redhead who was like an aunt to him. A hot aunt.

Patting the boy on his head she looked over to Ranma. "You still wearing that ugly shirt, you just need shopping done in general." She declared.

"Hey! It works!" Ranma defended his mode of dress.

"Yeah back in the eighties maybe," Evan mumble having decided to not give his friend any flack for the ugly orange.

"Even in the eighties it was ugly," Jean stated and saw Ranma almost folded in on himself from the amount of flack he was receiving. "I'll give Kitty some money so she can go get you some... decent clothes and you can pick out your suit there too!"

At the mention of the clothing for the dance Ranma stiffen up and looked at Jean. "About the --- dance."

"What about it?" Jean asked looking at the boy.

"I'm not going."

"What?" Evan shout as he look to his friend. "You're not!? Why not? Who's gonna be my wing man?!"

"Wingman?" Ranma asked not familiar with the term.

"You know, my partner to hunt for girls," Evan grinned before realizing he was in the presence of Ms. Grey. He shot a look to her but saw her looking curiously at Ranma.

"You have a date." Ranma declared flatly.

"She could dump me during the date and then were would I be? Always have a back up my friend, always have a back up," Evan nodded sagely.

"Oh I got a few," Ranma muttered ruefully thinking of Ukyou and Shampoo. The former had been angry when he left the latter had been oddly silent since his announcement.

"Ranma, mind if we talk real fast?" Jean asked tapping her head.

Ranma sighed but since he was here and didn't specifically come to her to whine he could get away with it. "Okay."

Evan curious as to what was going on asked. "What are yo-"

'What's this about not going to the dance?' Jean mental imagine said upon entering a Dojo that had a homey feel to it. In the center was Ranma looking at her.

'I just tend to put my foot in my mouth and I did it again with Akane,' Ranma replied as he grabbed his mental head in frustration. 'It's easier if show you.'

Jean only nodded not offering any comfort but neither was she judging. And just like that the landscape around them melted Ranma showed her what happened in the gym When all was said and done they were back in the Dojo with Ranma doing a kata against a dummy.

'See what I mean? I just mess it all up,' Ranma growled as he shattered the dummy post with a vicious kick.

'You did spectacularly made a mess of things,' Jean agreed before walking up to him. 'However it is not your fault.'

'So it's Akane fault?' Ranma asked with a raise eyebrow. Akane was never at fault.

'No, it's not her's either,' Jean replied softly.

'Then it's nobody fault?' Ranma asked with a raised eyebrow.

'Yes, it's nobody fault,' Jean confirmed making Ranma look confused. 'Ranma, do you mind if I tell you something as a friend, and your therapist?'

'Your in my head already, might as well,' Ranma replied with a rueful chuckle.

'You don't love Akane, on some level you might even resent her' Jean started and saw Ranma bristle. 'Yes you grew to love her, don't deny I saw it but you don't love her. Not really.'

Ranma remained silent and waited for the redhead to finished.

'I know what you did for her, I know what you have done for her, I know what you have given up for her,' Jean started as she continued to maintain eye contact with Ranma. ' However the fact of the matter is, that's not love, not really.'

'Then what do you call it them?' Ranma asked as he looked at the wooden walls of the dojo.

'A settlement,' Jean replied. 'You settle, you became who you are through the trials you faced yes, but those were your trials. Akane simply grew on you.'

'Don't people do that all the time?' Ranma asked as he turned back to Jean.

'Yes, but that in your two case, that does not appear to be enough for Akane, even if it is for you,' Jean stated sadly. 'Sometime, two people can love each other with all their hearts but still grow apart making them incompatible.'

Ranma have heard the rumors, the gossip. The whole love triangle between Jean, Scott and Ms. Frost. He never put much stock into the rumors but looking at Jean now he realize because he thought it, she knows it. Ashamed he look down at his feet.

'Don't be, I made my peace with it,' Jean replied lightly though there were still pain in her eyes. 'However my situation with Scott is no different then yours with Akane. I still love Scott, I don't think I can ever stop but I can't find happiness with him anymore either.'

'So you are saying I will never be happy with Akane?' Ranma asked respectfully. His teacher just bare a private part of her soul to him. He would treat it with reverence.

'I think Akane will never be happy with you, no matter what you do,' Jean replied as she look back to Ranma. 'There will always be the niggling doubt in her mind of you begin able to go anywhere else but choose her because of honor.'

Ranma remain silent. It's true he did choose her because of honor but he did like her, possibly love her.

'Akane will always be insecure about that, that is a facet of her personality she cannot change,' Jean stated and looked to Ranma. 'And because of your other engagements, the doubt will always consume her despite any love she might feel for you.'

'What should I do?' Ranma asked softly.

'Ranma,' Jean prompted while looking directly at the boy. 'How would you feel if you had no engagement at all? That as of right now you are a completely free man, in every sense of the word.'

Ranma could not suppressed it. The moment Jean put that thought into his head, the feeling, the elation, the freedom of such a prospect was overwhelming. It had bubble to the surface, his most fondest desire. For a second, with such freedom, he did not think of Akane, did not think of any fiancee. He felt happy. However as quickly as it came, he suppressed it, a look of horror on his face.

'You have your answer,' Jean had also felt that euphoria of happiness at Ranma thought, it was almost overwhelming to her. Ranma had chained down so many of his emotion, this one was just unadulterated pure overwhelming joy.

'I guess I should sit this dance out then,' Ranma sulked a bit. 'What with her being there and all with that Icky guy.'

'Icarus,' Jean corrected and looked at Ranma with sympathy. 'He's also a very good person. I still want you to go, prove to yourself that you are stronger here.'

Ranma look down at where Jean hand touched his heart and nodded. This was also like a battle, and Ranma doesn't run away in a battle, unless it leads to victory.

'Beside, your friends will be there, Evans, Beak,' Jean smiled and gave a knowing look. 'Others that you don't want to admit.'

"- are you guys doing?" Evan asked as the two looked at him. Ranma seem a bit better and Jean appeared as unflappable as always.

"Evan, Ranma will be going with you," Jean nodded as she notified Kitty that there was a few more people joining her group.

**** Westchester Outlet Mall ****

"Damn you Evan's because of you, I've seen hell!" Ranma glared, at his best friend who was returning his accusation with a toothy smile of his own.

"Aww come on man, look at this, how can you not like this?"

Ranma turned to glared at Inferno who had also accompanied them to get a formal suit. His eyes however was glued to the backside of some of the Xavier students. Seeing that, Ranma took his foot and kicked the boy shin.

"Ow damn it man!" Inferno hissed as he looked at Ranma. "None of these are your ladies, I asked remember?"

Ranma glared.

"Alright, Alright," Inferno eased up before his eyes glued to other passer by. "Hmmm got a nice ass on that fla-err- normie."

Evan had been ready to lay into Inferno again because of his liberal use of the word flatscan but seeing as how the boy made a solid effort to cut back he'd relent. Beside, Inferno was a pretty cool guy. After all they share the same hobbies, girl watching.

"Oh Ranma~," Kitty sang sweetly beckoning the pig tailed boy to her.

The three boys had been on a bench filled all of them had shopping bags in front of them and various boxes. None of it belonged to them.

Ranma turned back to the boy that got him to go onto this trip in the first place. "Hate you so much."

"Awww, how terrible, pretty girls calling you, what a CHORE," Evan exaggeratedly mocked before shooing Ranma off.

Ranma steel himself and walked into the teen department store and saw Kitty, The Cuckoo's, and Bloom all have various shirt hanged shirt in front of them as they pose in front of the mirror.

"No no no, we have to mix and match I am sick of monotone colors."

"What if I don't want to mix and match?"

"We ALWAYS mix and match!"

"Enough you two!"

"Do you think teal would go better with my hair or red?"

"Yes Ms. Pryde?" Ranma replied formally letting her know his displeasure. To his ire the woman only laughed as she pointed to the several more bags of things at the front desk. The cashier had been very accommodating after all the sheer amount of business they were bringing.

"That one has your suit in it," Kitty felt please with her selection. "The other should be your casual clothes, not to lie but if you can change into it here right now it'll be great, seriously, that orange is ugly as sin!"

"Hey!" Ranma protested but grumbled as he took the bags and went back to the bench with the boys. Glancing at the clock he noticed that it was a little pass three, almost time for the football game.

"Damn didn't think we'd be this long," Evan glanced at his cell phone for the time before turning to look at the girls. "Still not a bad trade off."

"You said it brother," Inferno grinned. The really did share the same interest. Too bad they were on opposing side.

"You like being their pack mule?" Ranma asked lifting all the assorted bags in his hand.

"Not I," Evan grinned and pointed to Ranma. "You, since you are all so strong and manly."

"Shut up," Ranma growled before taking his seat on the bench. If there was anything more boring then shopping for clothes he had yet to find it.

After another half an hour where the boys continued to flutter over by the girls who asked their opinions, they made their final selection and left a very happy mall shop.

"Damn look at those babes."

"Hell yeah, that brunette got a smoking body!"

"Three of a kind? Every man fantasy walking right there."

"That green hair girl is hot, look at the junk in her trunk!"

The women as if hearing the whispered from the passerby walked even more haughty if possible.

"You boys hungry?" Kitty asked a she realize it had been two hours since they started shopping. She wasn't sure if they had lunch or not.

"Yeah!"

"Nope!"

"No."

The yes came from the pig tail boy of course and grimaced as the girls giggled at him. Taking offensive he glared at them some more. "I have you know that-"

Anything Ranma wanted to say was suddenly stop as he felt the incoming attack. Immediately he threw his clothes away and slammed into Kitty and bowled over the three girls who looked at him in surprised.

A second later dozen of mini stunning missile was fired into their group stunning the boys and chaperone.

"Go! Go! Go! S.H.I.E.L.D.S will be here in 5 minutes with the distraction we provided."

Dozen of armored men with guns and various weapons decloaked and surrounded the group. Immediately they fired fist at Evans, then Inferno with electrical stunning bolt while several others fired directly into the Cuckoos.

"Oh hell no!" Kitty yelled angrily as she phase through the electrical current that they fired. Running quickly she punched the man in the gut, took his gun and fire it at him.

"What she said sucker," Ranma grinned as he fought off the group near him dodging their electrical attack. And actually taking out two of the guys that surrounded them. "Miss Pryde, take the girls out first!"

"I can't carry them all!" Kitty shouted but she was already moving, opting to grab the youngest girls first which was two of the Cuckoo's and phased through some walls.

"Just me and you now fuckers," Ranma taunted but felt something was off when the armored men moved away. Before he realize what happening several electrical bombs was toss his way and exploded knocking out an awakening Bloom and Inferno.

Even Ranma was not immune as he was took most of the blast full on but it did hurt enough for him to fall to his knees.

"Damn, must be a strength type," Several of the men rush forward and pull out little tazer sticks and stabbed the pigtailed boy with it.

"Argggh!!" Ranma shouted in pain as more and more cattle prod was stuck into him sending jarring electrical currents though him. As good as he was, he was overwhelmed as a final figure in armor black approach him and punched his face.

***** Somewhere****

Ranma woke up abruptly when he first a stinging sensation in his arms. Eyes widening, he tried to move but found that he could not.

"Ah ah, don't move this will only take a bit longer," a heavily scarred one eyed man in a white lab coat grinned as he pulled out another vial of Ranma's blood.

"Who the hell are you?" Ranma shouted and was rewarded when the one eye man step aside for one of his henchman. A moment later a cattle prod was stuck into his body making him almost scream in pain.

"Manners," the one eye man chided.

Ranma saw that he was hoist up with two cylindrical tube clamped on both his arms and so was his legs at the ankle. Ironically enough, he noted that his body made an 'X' symbol. Ranma glowered at the man and made to lunge at the him but found that the clamps holding him in was too strong.

"Hmmm, that's good, very good," the man ignored Ranma and glance at the vial of the blood. He over over to a cart where there was at least fifty vials of assorted blood on it.

"You will fine that your struggling is useless, the collar suppresses your x-gene."

Ranma made to lunge at the man again but the two guards with him took out their cattle prod and stabbed him in the chest with it before activating it.

"Mmmmmarghhh!!"

"Hah hah! Not so high and mighty now are you mutie?"

The two guards relented before stabbing the cattle prod into Ranma again to elicited on last scream before they left. While the one eye man put a fingers to his lips and pointed over to the right of Ranma, where he recognize his group, Inferno, Bloom, Celeste and Evan was still passed out. Their arms had been some metal clamp over them while their neck had a metal brace of some kind around it. To his surprise, by moving his head, he also felt a similar object around his.

"Guys?" Ranma tried to wake up his peers. "Guys!"

Yet the group was still passed out alone with his thoughts, Ranma looked at his surroundings. He was in in a white cell with a thick glass door in front of him. The place was well lit, almost as big as his room but had a hospital feel to it. Try as he might he couldn't pull his hand from the metal clamp making him agitated.

The last thing he remembered the electrical bombs shock. Everything had happen so fast, that even with his reflex he was still subdued. That had hurt his pride something quite fierce.

"Nngghh.."

"Ugh... my head..."

"My head! I can't feel anything!"

"What the hell hit me?"

Ranma turned to see a panicky Celeste, a fearful Bloom, a concern Inferno and shock Evan looking at themselves.

"Humans," Inferno spat in disgust.

Bloom had calmed down and look at the door, she closed her eyes as if to concentrate but a moment later opened them back up. "Inferno, try to use your powers."

"Alright captain," Inferno replied and snapped his fingers. "Errr... that's not suppose to happen."

Snapping a few more time, there still was none of the Genosha mutant conjured flame.

"Me too," Evan said as he found that his ability to shoot bones had been negated. He felt panic at the thought.

Celeste had closed her eyes as if straining but found nothing. Sensed nothing, not even her sisters. For once she was alone and it scared her. It was then she noticed the rest of the group who was trying the same thing as her but failing. Where were her sisters?

"Pheobe? Irma?!"

"Celeste!" Ranma shouted catching the group attention and wonder as to why he was capture different then themselves.

"Ranma?" Celeste eyes made out the pig-tailed boy. "I don't see my sisters!"

"Relax, I saw Ms. Pryde escape with them before I was knocked out," Ranma informed the sister who looked less panicked now.

There was a moment of silence as the group took in their predicament.

"So I dunno about you guys but I am getting the hell out of here first chance I get," Ranma let the group knew and started to strain his muscles against the clamp on his arms.

"Ranma! Dude, Don't hurt yourself man!" Evan shouted as he saw his friend seem to want to tear his arms out of it's socket.

Closing his eyes Ranma slowly try to summon his ki into his hands when the doors opened again. In came two soldiers and one person Ranma would have never expected to see. "Old Ghoul?!"

"My, my, my, former son in law," Cologne Elder of the Amazon tribe greeted with a maniacal cackle. "To think you were here and a mutant to boot!"

"I'm no mu-offf!" Ranma had retorted only to find the old woman staff embedded in his gut.

"Now now, it's rude to speak before your elders you know," Cologne tsked as she pogo to the other students who appeared defiant in her presence. She stopped in front of Inferno and Bloom. "And these must be our two guest from Genosha."

"Magneto will never let you get away with this you dried up monster!" Inferno shouted and made to lunge at the old woman but before he could reach her, the two guards pull out their shot stick and stabbed the red hair mutant with it.

"Argggghhh!"

"Your kind are the one with power and you called us monster?" The Amazon Elder scoffed with a raise eyebrow.

"Enough!" Bloom shouted as the two guard still had not removed the cattle prod from her team mates.

The old woman raised her hand and the two guard ease back to her side. She saw the green hair girl and the black boy checking on their fallen companion.

"Old Ghoul..." Ranma trailed off softly, he was in shocked and horrified by what happened. It happening to him was one thing, seeing it happen to someone else was pretty sickening.

"The X-men will come and find us," Evan stated defiantly glaring only at the woman but not daring to make a move unless he wanted to end up like Inferno.

"I highly doubt that," Cologne replied with a disgusting smile.

"Lord Magneto will or Professor Creed will," Bloom spoke up but made no move to attack the woman. "Then you'll be sorry."

"I highly doubt that too," Cologne rebutted with the same smile. "They are far FAR too busy at the moment. You few missing students are but a drop in the bucket."

Ranma looked at Cologne and understood she wanted to tell them something extremely shocking. "Spit it out already ya damn crone!"

"Because you are my former son-in-law, I will tell you," the old Amazon magnanimously replied. Looking at the two children from Genosha she smiled. "You see, as of yesterday, after your football game which ended your entire 'competition' a tie. A massive army of sentinels had made for a direct course for Genosha."

Bloom eyes widen in shock and fear. "N-No!"

"I am afraid yes," Cologne smiled nastily before she pogo toward Ranma. "Even as we speak, Earth Mightiest Heroes, the X-men, Magneto 'Brotherhood' and the U.S Army are combating the Sentinels on Genosha."

Bloom, Even and Celeste paled at the news and for once looked extremely fearful of the old woman before them.

"So as you can see no one is going to come looking for you, not with all those lives on the line. Why last I heard the death toll had already reach a million."

"Noo..." Bloom whispered hoarsely.

"What are you playing at Old Ghoul?" Ranma narrowed his eyes at the woman who he knew was dangerous but never realized how much.

Laughing the woman pogo back to Ranma. "Ah former Son-in-Law, always so perspective."

Ranma merely glared at the old woman, his sometime ally, his sometime enemy.

"Where do you think you are being held former son-in-law?" Cologne rose an eyebrow and look at the group. "You are all being held in a secret Sentinel Base. Normally a hundred Sentinels wouldn't be worth much but with all of the world and mutants eyes on Genosha...I am sure few hundred sentinels would do quite a bit of damage to the Xavier school."

There were a moment of silence as everything before Evan tried to attack the old woman only to be beaten down by the guards with the cattle prod.

"Yo-... I never thought you could ever be so evil," Ranma whispered, his very body feeling numbed by what this woman said she did.

"Evil? Former Son-in-Law?" Cologne scoffed. "Hardly, we did not start this war, they did, we are simply striking first before you could."

"That is a lie! We want to co-exist with normal humans," Celeste shot back.

"While that might be true for Xavier, Genosha is another matter," Cologne counted as she step in close to the blonde girl making her scoot back into the corner. "Everyone knows that as soon as Magneto finish training his military, he intents to start annexing parts of the world and with sixteen million mutants under his command, well not many would have a chance."

Bloom turned her head aside shocking Ranma who remember Herb words regarding humans and mutants. "War is inevitable..."

"Correct former Son-in-law," Cologne nodded approvingly. "The Coalition of Humanity will ensure humanity survival not mutantkind."

"Coalition of what? Assholes?" Ranma insulted and received a sharp rap to his head from the old woman stick.

The old woman cackle madly before grinning. "Oh yes, I am sure that groups like A.I.M, HYDRA, The Hands, the U-men, the Purifiers, among others are assholes but they have humanity best interest at heart."

Bloom and Celeste eyes widen at the listen of names.

"And the Amazon's not?" Ranma scoffed and received another hard hit from the old bat.

"We are the Elites, capable of matching any mutants," Cologne declared proudly. "The Musk have joined Genosha side, it seems fitting that we joined humanity's."

"It has been good chatting with you former son-in-law," Cologne nodded fondly. "You know, if you weren't a mutant, they would have persuade you by any means necessary to join the cause, too bad you are one.

Ranma looked at the Old woman who seem to suddenly feel old.

"Care for a drink former son-in-law?" Cologne looked directly into Ranma eyes.

"Sure old bat," Ranma agreed unsure of what was going on, there was something off about the old woman, the way she was acting upon reflection was so extremely off.

The old woman took a glass cup filled it with water and to everyone in the room surprise, placed it on top of Ranma's head before cackling evilly.

"Well, I must say, I do hope you don't make too big of a mess," Cologne cackle and made to leave and suddenly stop. "Oh and don't worry, I believe your old sparring partner, Hibiki is in one of these cells. You'd be amaze at what the Bakusai Tenketsu can do to his rock skin. Quite... entertaining."

After a few moment with a still Ranma and cackling Cologne the old woman left with two chuckling guards at the boy predicament. Truly there was no way for the boy to drink that water with out getting all over himself.

Ranma remain still, balancing the glass of water on his head, straining to hear the retreating footstep.

"Ranma, I'll try and help you drink the water," Celeste got up to her feet and got in front of Ranma only to see his eyes widen as if in shock. Behind her Inferno was being cared for by Bloom while Evan gingerly got back to a sitting position.

"You never cease to amaze old bat..." Ranma whispered respectfully startling the blonde in front of him.

"Ranma?" Celeste as she tried to think of a way to help Ranma drink the water.

"Don't," Ranma command making Celeste freeze. "Look out the doors and see if there's anyone patrolling.

Unsure of why Ranma requested such a thing, she went to the glass opening and looked around. "All clear."

Ranma looked at Evan who was looking wounded while Celeste was looking straight at him. "Alright then, it's time to get out of here."

"And how are we going to do that?" Evan asked listlessly.

"I'm breaking us out of course," Ranma answered and grinned. "And we're freeing all the capture mutants in here."

"Oh great plan high and mighty leader," Celeste rolled her eyes. Ranma was known for his bravado if nothing else. "How do you suppose to get out of that thing you're in?"

Ranma grinned and looked at his friends. "Like this of course."

What happened next stunned Celeste, startled, Evan and made Bloom look hopeful as the handsome boy melted into a smaller, slimmer, bustier redhead. The cuff suddenly became two size too big as the girl easily slip out of the binds that was on her.

"Instructor Mystique?" Bloom asked in awed. To her surprise however the redhead looked at her oddly.

"Who's that?" the boy turned girl asked. "I'm Ranma, remember?"

"A-are you for real?" Celeste asked as she got in close to Ranma and groped the smaller girl making her jump even as she broke the collar on her neck in half.

"Hey! Hands Celeste!" Girl type Ranma rebuked and saw the blonde looked at her in marvel.

"Ranma?" Evan asked as he saw the lovely red head before him "Like.. RANMA?!"

"Yeah, Ranma!" Girl type Ranma responded with a roll of her eyes even as she easily snap off Celeste arm building and then the x-gene suppressing collar.

Immediately, Celeste went into the girl claiming to be Ranma mind and found that she really did believe she was Ranma only to feel the girl mind react violently to the intrusion.

"What did I say about READING MY MIND!" Ranma hissed at the girl making the blonde stop before she went over to Evan and broke his collars and cuffs.

"Ranma?!" Evan said again in shock as the brute strength the girl exhibit in breaking open their cuff.

"For the last time YES Evan!" Ranma exasperatedly answered as she finished freeing Inferno and Bloom.

Celeste who began to read the minds of the group around her save the girl claiming to be Ranma, felt comforted that her power came back.

Evan himself was testing his power and found his bone spike abilities was his once again.

"What now?" Celeste asked after the girl Ranma finished freeing everyone. To her surprise, Ranma went to the door and punched it making it bend.

"Damn it, wish I was in my guy form,"Girl type Ranma cursed before she winded up her fist and punched the thick glass door several more time breaking it down.

Naturally such an occurrence would alert the base as the alarm blared out.

Moving quickly Ranma punched the door of the room across her and found several older mutants who had also looked tired and haggard. After breaking their chains she set about freeing all the prisoners and had reached the last one only to find Ryoga chained up much like she was inside. However, his right arm was hanging limply on it's side, the skin cracked open and expose, if she didn't know any better, she say all it would take is one strong strike and Ryoga arms would be shattered.

"Ryoga..." Ranma muttered softly. Ripping the cuffs off of him, she handed Ryoga over to a similar strong type looking mutant that resemble a tree. "Be gentle with him please."

"I will," The Tree guy who called himself Bark replied as he easily handled the stone mutant.

Running through the corridor, Ranma easily took out the sparse guards knocking them out. "Celeste, read their mind, find us a way out."

Celeste move ahead of the group who was on alert for more attack nodded. A moment later she looked at the man before her. "His helmet is preventing me like magneto's, can you remove it?"

Ranma easily complied as he tore the helmet off and revealed a normal looking man. "Now Celeste?"

"Got it!" Celeste eyes glowed as she rooted through the pig's head. He was a member of the U-Men who wanted to harvest mutant organs. Nodding.

"Wait, show me," Ranma said looking at a shocked Celeste.

"Wha?"

"Just this time you have permission to go in my head, give me the information, I can scout for us better," Ranma responded and waited for the sensation of someone going into his head.

Celeste eased herself into Ranma's head and gave the girl type Ranma all the necessary information. Along the way she caught snippets of keys words and images of some pools, training grounds and Jusenkyo.

"Got it," Ranma nodded before turning to the group. "Wait for two minutes before following me. Celeste will lead you."

The group nodded as the red head moved quickly through the north corridor. After the time was up they moved as one and saw bodies of soldiers all knocked out littering the floor. Relieved they quickly ran after Ranma and found themselves on a metal bridge with sentinels being assemble by the factory underneath them.

"Whoa, freaky," Evan said as he saw machines build mutant hunting machines.

"This is there can be no peace," Bloom gritted her teeth in anger as she watch the machine assemble more and more machine, surprisingly enough, they have yet to be activated.

"You guys coming?" Ranma asked startling the group. No one, had heard the girl approach. "I cleared it all the way to the entra-"

Anything Ranma wanted to say was stop as she dodge a figured clad in black/ He had dropped down directly on her from the ceiling. Suddenly the smaller sentinels underneath them activated and flew up their guns pointed at the group.

"Mutant's detected, surrender or be destroyed."

Celeste turned into her diamond form even as the other mutants got into a fighting stance as dozen more smaller sentinels surrounded the group.

"Back into your cells mutants," the black clad figure spoke in a commanding tone before looking at Ranma. "You too Saotome."

Ranma eyes widen, she recognized that voice. It couldn't be... "Ryu?"

The black clad figure removed his masked and gave the redhead girl a hard look. "So we meet again. I guess it was inevitable."

"You work for them now?" Ranma spat in disgust.

Ryu narrowed his eyes. "I work for humanity now."

Then without warning, his made an air slash that struck the girl type Ranma slamming her back against the door they just exited from.

"Ranma!" Celeste and Evan shouted in concern as one.

"I say it again," Ryu gave a hard look to all the mutants. "Back into your cell."

+++Outside+++

The secret sentinel base had horn had stared blaring almost immediately as Cologne exited.

"Matriarch," one of the soldiers stopped. "Shouldn't we go back inside to restore order?"

"No," Cologne said as her hand blurred and slit the throat of the two soldiers. Even as two more armor clad soldiers ran toward her. "Pity but can't leave anyone alive. Shampoo, Mousse you finished the job?"

"Yes great grand mother," Shampoo replied I Chinese. "We killed as many key scientist as possible but only delay sentinel attack."

"We best get back before other Elder grows suspicious," Cologne said as she and her two aide commandeered an aircraft.

"What about ai- Ranma?" Shampoo asked throwing a concern look over her shoulders. Mousse in turn had a hard look to him but did not act as usual.

"What happen next would be up to son-in-law," Cologne sigh as the plane took off with Mousse flying it.

"He will not fail," Shampoo assured her grandmother.

"I certainly hope not, those children lives are in his hand now."

TBC....


So things I am looking for

1. Did you get that it was Herb and Ranma talking at the very beginning, because their conversation, whatever it was boils down to that. Or should I blatantly add "Dragon-breath" or something just as disparaging at the end?

2. Did Cologne come off evil at first before she seem fishy before her reveal?

3. Flow and what not of course, character interaction, Akane/Ranma scene awkward but honest?

4. Do I need to add a scene for Genosha possibly with Destiny (the I can see everything mutant) seeing a great darkness spreading toward Genosha before cutting to Ranma imprisonment OR does it work better when Cologne tells it.

5. Does the balance of power which seem stacking forever in the Mutant side by me making Herb and Saffron mutants , shifted with the introduction of the Amazons into the new Coalition of Humanity + Ryu , which I had planned.

6. Girl revealed, was it worth the wait and did the foreshadowing of the missing Ryoga now make sense?

That's pretty much all I can think of. Thanks :D
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby PCHeintz72 » Sun Jan 25, 2015 2:00 pm

Ugh... I was with Jean up to her suggesting he still attend... Bleagh, dances are chores, never much saw the worth. It also in this case means he had to be suckered into shopping with girls.

Maybe this is her method of payback for forcing her to give advice...

Rolls eyes... I knew something was missing form this story, a group of mutant haters kidnapping Ranma thinking him a mutant.
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby Vahn » Sun Jan 25, 2015 2:38 pm

PCHeintz72 wrote:Ugh... I was with Jean up to her suggesting he still attend... Bleagh, dances are chores, never much saw the worth. It also in this case means he had to be suckered into shopping with girls.

Maybe this is her method of payback for forcing her to give advice...

Rolls eyes... I knew something was missing form this story, a group of mutant haters kidnapping Ranma thinking him a mutant.


And yet Dances are such a girl thing, why you think she insist? :P Yeah there was a group of mutant hater now there is an army. Muwahaha!
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby ijp92 » Sun Jan 25, 2015 4:49 pm

1. Unfortunately several fanfic authors habit of random quotes at the beginning of there chapters means that I didn't even try and guess the who and when of the opening quote.

2. My first thought was "no way, she has to be playing them". Then as the scene went on I thought she was on the level. Then I realized my first instinct was correct.

3. I thought the Ranma/Akane scene was really well done.

4. I think Cologne's monologue worked well on its own. A scene with Destiny would be superfluous.

5. Do the Amazons balance the Musk and Phoenix? Considering that Cologne was legitimately frightened of Herb not really. The fact that this implies most if not all martial arts and crafts practitioners are human does more to balance it though.
If your talking about balancing the two sides in the war? No not really, but considering that the mutants lost the war canonically (if I remember) it doesn't really need to.
To be honest though, one an individual basis the fact that Ranma is presented as such a king-maker himself does plenty to balance the X-men v Genosha and more than enough for the X-men against the Coalition of Humanity.

6. I was personally more shocked that it took this long for it to be revealed.
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby Vahn » Sun Jan 25, 2015 5:02 pm

@Ijp

1. Hmm, I'll play around with it a bit more.

2. Good enough thanks!

3. Whew.

4. Okay, that's one against on a destiny scene.

5.Yes, the Amazon are to balance the Musk on Genosha while the Phoenix Tribes are affiliated with the X-men thus anti Genosha and of course no fond of humans. As for the sides, Well the mutant lost and didn't lost, you know time travel shenanigans.

6. Well I wanted a scene where the Curse works in a funny and meaningful way and not just "Oh he has a curse," and then put it on the back burner :D
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby Crescent Pulsar S » Sun Jan 25, 2015 5:51 pm

2: I was more concerned that Cologne might be a cliche baddie (because she's often depicted as such in fan-fiction even though she's not all that antagonistic), so I waited for the scene to play out before I decided what to think about it. On reflection, her behavior may have seemed a little forced, though I can't say if that was a ploy to trick us or give us a hint, or showing that Cologne isn't perfect at acting. Overall, though, it was fine.

3: Flow's alright, I guess. I wasn't impressed with how much contrivance went into getting Ranma to the mall, between the dance and his "ugly" attire, though.

4: With the focus on Ranma, a prelude to what's happening after he and the others are kidnapped would be too much of a detour. Unless, directly after they are kidnapped, you insert that in addition to some significant scenes regarding the start of the fighting, up until the time that Ranma would awake.

5: Honestly, I'm more worried about two small, obscure cultures in a remote region of China, especially the one where their "neighbors" -- the Joketsuzoku -- had thought them to be long gone up until Herb needs to find that kettle, are this connected to the world stage. It certainly doesn't look like the scope of their concerns would go beyond the region in which they live. The Phoenix's small connection to one of the players is understandable, though.

6A: I don't think it was worth it, honestly. If something like that happened earlier in the story, yeah, but holding it back that long for a few paragraphs, which you still could have achieved if the curse had come out before multiple times (since you could have conceivably done it without Evan or Celeste seeing it, or at least one of them), makes it seem more like you went out of your way to make a Chekhov's gun scenario possible. With this set up, it's much too late to change now, so... It is what it is.

6B: I kind of figured that Ryoga had been nabbed. I wouldn't call it foreshadowing, though. There really wasn't a hint for why Ryoga was missing, or how he went missing, only that he was, so we're not given any tale-telling sign of what to expect in relation to it.
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby Vahn » Sun Jan 25, 2015 6:02 pm

@ CP

2. Cool thanks!

3. It is what it is, but you seen Ranma that orange shirt is ugly as hell :P

4. So that's two against any filler scene.

5. The reason why they are on the world stage will be explain in the final part :D

6.Thanks for the input. I guess you could say I didn't want girl type Ranma to be one and done. I was trying to give girl type Ranma more weigh in what she can do instead of being the usual gag for Ranma. Like how she was for the Herb fight. I was not familiar with the Chevov gun reference and had to Google that.

Thank's CP
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby Crescent Pulsar S » Sun Jan 25, 2015 6:40 pm

I don't really have a problem with the orange shirt. Well, maybe with the little, red bow at the collar. Although both look a lot better on him when he's a girl. Then again, a lot of things look better on Ranma when he's a girl. :P

Girl type Ranma doesn't have to be one and done, and that's kind of the point. She normally turns up so much, whether it's necessary or not, so there should be opportunities to do more than gags/jokes with it. Or, for instance, even if it's an element that seems like it's only for laughs at first, you can flip that on your audience later. Sometimes, like with Ranma's curse, it's subtlety that will likely work best, because suppressing its presence drew unwanted attention to it, due to its absence being strange. (And it was odd that he'd gone so long as a "special needs" student, which couldn't have been due to being human, and no one even seems the least bit curious as to why.)
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby Vahn » Sun Jan 25, 2015 7:45 pm

Crescent Pulsar S wrote:I don't really have a problem with the orange shirt. Well, maybe with the little, red bow at the collar. Although both look a lot better on him when he's a girl. Then again, a lot of things look better on Ranma when he's a girl. :P

Girl type Ranma doesn't have to be one and done, and that's kind of the point. She normally turns up so much, whether it's necessary or not, so there should be opportunities to do more than gags/jokes with it. Or, for instance, even if it's an element that seems like it's only for laughs at first, you can flip that on your audience later. Sometimes, like with Ranma's curse, it's subtlety that will likely work best, because suppressing its presence drew unwanted attention to it, due to its absence being strange. (And it was odd that he'd gone so long as a "special needs" student, which couldn't have been due to being human, and no one even seems the least bit curious as to why.)


Hmm as for the special needs, did you care who was in 'special care' when you were in high school? I had though about doing that but wanted to avoid the whole hive mind mentality of everyone in the school thinking the same thing and feeling the same way save one outliner here and there. I try to make teens do teens thing which is if it doesn't concern them or their social circle they don't care. The adults knows and that is all that matters. So bouncing Ranma between low man on the totem pole generally but high out liner in the upper echelons.

As for the curse, there is a reason why too that would be revealed in the latter chapters. In the next arc on why he's free from watery incident for a long time. :D Once again appreciate your feedback. :P I had to shortened you in my AN to CP beacuse CPS = Child Protective Service :P
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby Crescent Pulsar S » Sun Jan 25, 2015 9:23 pm

I was in "special care," otherwise known as special education. Still, this is different. If it were a matter of education, curious teenagers, who have a habit of identifying things that are different or stand out (for whatever reason) if they notice it, could easily assume why Ranma got special education and move on as far as that is concerned (or do what some others did to me, and do that bullying thing, or do something that is meant to insult you when you happen to look their way, since those in special education were pretty much the equivalent of retards, a position that teenagers are liable to look down upon). However, in this case, he stands out because there is nothing obvious that makes him special, like the three examples or so that all stood out appearance-wise (Myst being among them), and the fact that he's human -- or attested to be human -- makes it even more strange that he has special needs. After all, there's no oddity with his body as far as anyone can tell, and he supposedly doesn't have any powers that could be an issue. I find it unbelievable that no one would notice or ask about it.

And you're quite wrong about your reasoning behind teens doing teen things, because they most certainly can -- and do -- care about things outside of their social circles. The fact is, it's common for teens to think, behave and believe in similar ways, even if it's just a passing phase, and there are also bound to be a few odd ones who go about things differently. It just ends up sounding like you have something against natural occurrences. Heck, I was the only one in my high school who wore their winter jacket until the final day of school, in June. Or, at least, I seriously doubt that anyone else had been doing that. And while more likely to happen, I doubt many didn't go into the lunch room to eat (whether they had the money/means to or not), in part because I needed aid to afford lunch and that sort of thing also catches plenty of attention, some of it -- of course -- negative. The thing is, I was a complete and total outcast, but I was still a crowd by myself; people noticed. In fact, it was the adults who didn't notice, or -- more likely -- didn't care/turned a blind eye.

And what's wrong with being a protector of children!? :O
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby Vahn » Sun Jan 25, 2015 9:59 pm

I guess you can say everyone high school life was a bit different as I never care who's who unless it was the big man on campus. Certainly not the special need or honor rolls students. I guess that's how I see it plus using the teen movies and x-men comics as reference. Like I say, teen doing teen things. Doesn't always synch up or match each others. I do enjoy these in depth discussion and it does play into how I would tweak the next set and interaction if I find that it make sense :D
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby Crescent Pulsar S » Sun Jan 25, 2015 10:30 pm

Using teen movies and X-men for references in how teens operate? Ewwww. Nothing good could come from that. :shock: :P
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby Vahn » Sun Jan 25, 2015 10:34 pm

:P This fic did muwhaha!
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby PCHeintz72 » Sun Jan 25, 2015 10:58 pm

Vahn wrote:I guess you can say everyone high school life was a bit different as I never care who's who unless it was the big man on campus. Certainly not the special need or honor rolls students. I guess that's how I see it plus using the teen movies and x-men comics as reference. Like I say, teen doing teen things. Doesn't always synch up or match each others. I do enjoy these in depth discussion and it does play into how I would tweak the next set and interaction if I find that it make sense :D

I guess I myself am a bit unusual... I despised my high school years and was pretty miserable though them... I was much happier in college. Except perhaps 3-4 teachers and 4-5 students scattered over that time, pretty much the bulk of the rest building could have sod off and die and I would not have overly cared.

It always astounds me to read stories or seen anime with people *liking* high school life. The less said about wacky sitcoms the better, as they don't come remotely close to accurate representation of what it was like.

Oh, and the 'special care' or 'special needs' thing was called the 'LD program' in my school system.

Otherwise, there were only 2 tracks you could take after 10th grade... the college bound track and the normal track.

Note I do not really count this story as showing high school life. The simple issue is there is no Bayville public school portrayed here. Xavier's school, while admittedly a school, cannot be considered representative of high school life.
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Re: Homo Superior 8 - Ranma/Xmen [Rough Draft]

Postby digitalzombie » Mon Jan 26, 2015 1:52 am

> 1. Did you get that it was Herb and Ranma talking at the very beginning, because their conversation, whatever it was boils down to that. Or should I blatantly add "Dragon-breath" or something just as disparaging at the end?

No I didn't get that it was Herb that was talking. I was more like oh ok it's somebody and I'll eventually find out when the Author decides to tell me. Eventually I forgot about it really until later on when Ranma whispered it to Cologne.

> 2. Did Cologne come off evil at first before she seem fishy before her reveal?

She seems fishy when she hit Ranma right before he going state that he's not a mutant.

> 3. Flow and what not of course, character interaction, Akane/Ranma scene awkward but honest?

This flow is much better. The last two chapters flow was meh, I can't explain it shrug.

> 4. Do I need to add a scene for Genosha possibly with Destiny (the I can see everything mutant) seeing a great darkness spreading toward Genosha before cutting to Ranma imprisonment OR does it work better when Cologne tells it.

I don't recall any great darkness spreading...

> 5. Does the balance of power which seem stacking forever in the Mutant side by me making Herb and Saffron mutants , shifted with the introduction of the Amazons into the new Coalition of Humanity + Ryu , which I had planned.

Shrug, no comment. I'm more happy with these revelation in term of who you gonna make a mutant or not.

> 6. Girl revealed, was it worth the wait and did the foreshadowing of the missing Ryoga now make sense?

I didn't realize there was a wait for girl side.

The foreshadowing make sense for Ryoga now.



Overall, this chapter come together nicely, with what you're trying to accomplish with Ranma having to go through Akane and the fiancee stuff and also Ryoga. The previous two chapters I was pretty bored but I didn't want to say much about it cause you're laying some ground work for this I guess and I'm just impatient action junkie. I'm just happy with the action here and also coming together nicely. Also really love the Jean and Ranma interaction with the tie up and the relationship/dynamic that you're showing between Ranma and Jean. The Cyclop and Emma bit is nice and I thought it was very believable and good.

I think so far Jean is the closest relationship I've seen you've done? Then in order Celeste, Cat girl, Evan, Beak and Myst.

I'm really digging this chapter. Character growth? Or going through growth, and Ranma interactions with Jean, and action.
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