A Ralts in Moonlight (Complete)

[KonokoHasano]

I think I'd agree with that, Heaven's. Stringing together and improving on skills is what he does best.


Also, chapter is finished. ^_^

[Dumbledork]

Excellent addition. I like the idea of Ranma finding a family. Maybe he'll learn what a family is really all about. I'm pretty sure some positive influences willdo him a lot of good.

[Kimina]

*more knowing-smirkyness*

[KonokoHasano]

I was actually wondering if I ended the chapter a little too abruptly and should add a little more to it. It seemed like a good stopping place, but I'm not too sure exactly.

I can actually see him getting hold of some cloth and using some 'Anything Goes Sewing' or something to create a small shirt -- maybe after spying on people and seeing some wear some Chinese style shirts and end up thinking about one.

The idea someone had of Mewtwo and Mew making an appearance would also be interesting. I can see Ranma learning a few things from them.

And it's an obvious bit in this story that Ranma will have a large dislike for Pokemon trainers, and he will enjoy 'beating the snot' out of them and their Pokemon if they challenge him to a fight.

[borgrabbit]

One of them appeared to be a large man dressed in a green uniform and cap, while the second was a very young girl with dark hair braided in pigtails.

The young girl turned her head and regarded the two men in gi. She then turned her head and tugged onto the large man’s sleeve. “Papa, customers are here.” The large man -- her father -- took the pipe he was smoking out of his mouth and stood up. The girl followed, and both turned towards Ranma and Genma.

“Welcome sirs, to legendary training ground of accursed springs, Jusenkyou. I am the guide to the springs,

One quick little comment. When they first meet the guide, you seem to have the guide speaking in pidgin japanese, with no reference as to how he knows to properly address them.

“Plum, how many times must I say to not throw rocks at stubborn sirs who make you angry while they are standing on a bamboo pole or near a spring?” His answer was only a blush. With a sigh, he told his daughter to go and get the younger customer while he attended to the older one.

They speak in pidgin between themselves. I'd figure that this would be done in chinese with as good diction as the two were capable of?
And, actually, "Her answer was only a blush."

Wes

[KonokoHasano]

You're right, I should probably fix up those scenes. thanks for pointing those out.


Something I've been planning on is not uploading any chapters of this story to Fanfiction.net until later on when I can update the chapters gradually. Focusing on my other stories first would be a better idea.

[borgrabbit]

Just don't forget this one, okay? I don't know how others might view it, but I like it a lot. I am still trying to find the anime episode(s) that have these characters, but I'm still trying to refine my search techniques.
Here's a very human-form centric version of a ralts, etc. family. Whoever did it, totally removed the alienness of their forms, but it is kind of cute.

http://rm-tosca.deviantart.com/art/PKM- ... y-50846735

[KonokoHasano]

I won't forget about this story. Except for Against the Wickedness, I haven't forgot any of my others.

Episode 382 -- The Film's Riding on Camerupt -- has a Kirlia in it.

Episode 386 -- Do I hear a Ralts -- has Ralts with a couple appearances of Gardevoir and Kirlia

The sixth Pokemon movie -- Jirachi - Wish Maker! -- has a Kirlia

Episode 423 -- Fear Factor Phony -- has a Kirlia, and I think there's a Ralts in it too.

Episode 488 -- Mutiny in the Bounty/Pokemon Hunter J -- has both a Kirlia and Gardevoir

A small AMV that has clips from Do I hear a Ralts

It's in Norwegian, butthis is a bit of the Ralts episode.

This one's just adorable

[Darkbane848]

It's in Norwegian, butthis is a bit of the Ralts episode.

Actually, it's not norwegian. This clip is from the Netherlands, and I believe deutch is the language spoken there.

[Dumbledork]

Yep, it's in Dutch. And the title translates as 'Do I hear a Ralts?'

[Spokavriel]

“You realize how much of a girl you sound like right now?”

This sentence isn't hard and accusing enough for the Genma I know. Are you using it to make a canon break? I know "You sound like a girl" is over done but that's Genma. Tack on some insults like weak pathetic worthless etc and you get his attempts at variety on that sentiment.

I really like that you got Genma a female curse too using his words. "Now that He had comming."

“I man, you do know that doing this is illegal, right?”

Lost an e in mean.

‘I’ve never heard of a Ralts blue eyes like that. If I catch it, I’ll probably become famous!’

I think you left out a with.

/But, now did it happen?/ Mia shyly asked.

how now so close in appearance and they even had to put the keys right next to eachother.

Definately a great start here. I kinda wonder how long all of this will take though. With Genma-pandigirl going off to tell people Ranma's dead you're going to have a whole new world to plan for that Ranma-ralts can return to.

Now to see other peoples comments.

I like where the chapter ends now. It leaves allot of questions and allot of posibilities. For fun you might even want to wrap up Genma's tale to a point so that there's some certainty of what would be happening with him while Ranmas new life goes on.

I'm not sure Ranma would get away with doing clothes for a while. First it would stand out too much and the family would have enough trouble keeping the behavior and blue eyes from being dead give aways already.

However you end up releasing the story just remember people will get use to the patern if you get into one.

[KonokoHasano]

Having a small side-plot about Genma and all the things that fall onto him because he doesn't have his bargaining chip -- err -- son there so he could weasel away might be a nice idea.

For right now, I'd have to agree with the clothing thought. The main detail right now is getting Ranma used to his psionic abilities, and to learn a little more about the workings of the world he's now living in.

I've finally also decided that the story will take place in Kanto -- in the anime, non Kanto Pokemon started showing in the wild after Ash left for the other regions, so it's safe to assume that there's always been 'non-Kanto' Pokemon in Kanto.

This would also create possible scenarios where Ranma ends up meeting Mew & Mewtwo, as well as coming into contact with Sabrina.

[Spokavriel]

I have an explaination for the species not being in other areas before Ash's travels. Look at how Xenophobic Australia and New Zealand have to be to keep avoiding a repeat of former agricultural devistation. Before Professor Oak's research All the island nations had to beware of any alien immigrant species and only after the researchers proved that it wouldn't cause a calamity they started allowing trainers and Pokémon to come across as they will.

It doesn't plug all the plot holes but it's better than no explaination at all.

[Dumbledork]

But I hope none of the NWC or other people from the ranmaverse will join him. That's what kills a lot of good crossovers in my opinion.

[KonokoHasano]

Spokavriel: Researching could have something to do with it if one needed a real explanation.

Dumbledork: None of the Nerima people will end up in Ranma's new world. I also find that things like that kind of ruin things.