REN Side Story - Kill the Cullens

[LawOhki]

It was now shortly after five in the morning, and Ranma dropped to hover a meter off the ground before returning to human form. A half hour before her phone had rang, another murder had occurred, and the Police Chief was going to arrive at her hotel to take her there. It was a welcome distraction, searching had been fruitless, it was a group of three vampires, and they had repeatedly split up, gone in different directions, rejoined, split up, and she really just wanted to know if they were directionless like Ryoga had been.

Slipping into her room to get a blood pack from the small fridge that had been brought along, she switched into different clothing. A fresh pair of jeans with a holster slipped into the back to hold one of her pistols, a button up black shirt, and a thick forest green hooded sweatshirt with a half zipper front. Hearing the honk of a car horn, she exited the room to enter Swan’s police cruiser.

“How old are you anyways?” The Police Chief asked as they pulled out of the small road the Inn was on, and on to a major one that cut through town.

“Why do you ask?”

“Sorry, you just don’t seem like you’re old enough to be a-- what did your office call it?”

“We’re called Special Agents, and my age doesn’t matter, only ability.”

“So why do you dress like you should be in high school in a few hours? Doesn’t your office want you to look professional?”

“I dress comfortably.” She answered, briefly scanning his mind to see that he was just curious, and she couldn’t begrudge him that. Her age and size were an obvious issue when trying to get respect from people who didn’t know what she was. Gender also played a part and she was no stranger to being treated differently based on what gender she was. “And wearing a military uniform out in the public makes my job harder.”

“Ah.” He nodded at that explanation, believing that she was an undercover agent. They turned left off the main road. “If you want some coffee, there’s some in the thermos.”

“I don’t drink coffee.”

“Stunt your growth?”

“Can’t say I’m worried about that.” She didn’t have to worry about wrinkles or age, but he didn’t need to know that. Although it would be nice to naturally age just a couple years.

‘These lesser vampires have an advantage on me. They don’t sleep, so they can be moving around during the day.’ She fumed, all the ground she had covered during the night didn’t mean much to a vampire that could keep going indefinitely.

“Any details you want to tell me?” She asked.

“The first body was spotted by a truck driver at about four and the deputy who investigated found another one caught on some bushes in the river. Everything matches the other attacks and obviously no one saw it.”

Ranma frowned, there was simply too much area for her to cover on foot to find these vampires. They didn’t need to sleep during day and they were smart enough to target humans who were not going to be found for at least a few hours. She wasn’t about to spend her nights roaming through the woods hoping to find a good trail or to simply come across her targets. So that meant she would have to use the one solid lead she had, and stick to that.

She saw the lights of two patrol cars on the other side before they passed over a large river, and slowed to a stop. An ambulance was there as well, paramedics were waiting for permission from a man investigating a body next to a park bench near the riverbank to start packing up the bodies. Getting out of the patrol car, she straightened out her hoodie, and headed over to see how these vampires ate.

“I’m sorry miss but this is a crime scene.” A policeman stopped her.

Reaching into her back pocket, she pulled out her paperwork and showed it to the man. “I go where I want.” Folding up the leather case with her identification, she put it back in her pants, and went past him without a second thought.

“It’s fine Larry, she’s with me.” Charlie patted the man on the shoulder and followed after her. “You sure you want to see this? The other bodies weren’t pretty.”

“I’m sure I’ve seen worse.” When she saw the first body she had been right. It was all torn up like the vampires had plunged their fingers into the flesh and pulled out large chunks. Crescent shape bite dotted the body, some were just signified by where the teeth had cut in, others it was like a melon baller had cut into the flesh.

‘Pathetic.’ She shook her head with disgust. ‘It’s no wonder these vampires have to feed every other night, half the blood is laying on the ground because they’re so berserk.’

Finding that Charlie was expecting for her to add something, she took a moment longer to study the corpse. The other one would look similar but a bit more waterlogged. “It’s definitely what I’m looking for-- and more than one, possibly three.”

“Any advice?”

“Bag up the bodies, there’s nothing to learn from them. I’ll also need a ride back into town.”

“You don’t want to look around?”

“No, they’re already gone and I’ve been up all night and would like to get a couple hours of sleep.”

“Sleep isn’t a luxury we have here; we got multiple murderers out there if you’re right, and we need to find them.” Charlie tried to be commanding over her, but Ranma just stared at him impassively.

“They just ate, a lot, they aren’t going to want anything for at least another day, so me getting some sleep isn't going to change a thing. Now drive me back, it’s almost morning.” She used an authoritative voice again, avoiding use of a mental command.

“Fine, but when you get done with your beauty rest, I want to know what’s going on.” He demanded.

“If I feel like it.”

[frice2000]

Well due to this fic I subjected myself to watching the two movies with Rifftrax commentary. I have to say they were some of the best riffing jobs by Mike, Kevin, and Bill out of the twelve or so ones I've watched. As to the fic itself it makes more sense now. You did get me tainted now though. Back to some good urban fantasy to cleanse it off.

After actually watching those two 'films' I hope you have Bella ask Ranma what being a vampire is like and then scare the shit out of her. Honestly girls like 17 and thinks she's dying and needs to be immortal? Christ kid you should want to look at least 20 if you're shooting for immortality...ach those movies were stupid.

Oh and another observation the story needs lots and lots more ellipses. You are not recreating the incredibly shitty dialogue I just sat through in it's true disgusting form. Oh and if that girl gets nightmares from the guy she's known for like a year leaving her I can just imagine what she'll dream after Ranma gets done with her. Please, keep her alive so that she can suffer.

[LawOhki]

Ranma resisted, she fought with all her strength, but in the end the endless ringing of the Alarm clock above her head won in the end. Even though it would be so easy to smash it and go back to sleeping the rest of the day. Not even these lesser vampires had to feed so much that she couldn’t enjoy a nice day’s sleep. Fumbling around with her hand, she finally hit the button to turn it off. Pushing open the lid of her coffin, she sat up and stared forward blearily, and smacked her lips together a few times.

Standing up in the coffin, she stepped out from behind the bed where it was hidden. Room service was under strict orders not to enter her room. The last thing she wanted was some nosey maid to find a coffin and a fridge full of blood in a room. Dressed in a set of flannel pajamas Ceres had given her, they were black with orange outlined bat figures, and she still couldn’t figure out if the blond draculina had done it as a gag or was just being oblivious.

First order of business was breakfast, although it was four in the afternoon, so it was approaching dinner time for humans. While finishing off the blood pack, her mind flashed to the murdered couple from last night, initiating a strong desire to find her own meal. Cold lifeless blood had long since lost any appeal apart from its ability to keep the hunger at bay.

Sliding open the curtains, the sky was cloudy but with enough gaps to let a significant amount of sun through. Glaring at the sky for this affront, she really should have brought along Ceres. At least that way they could take turns being up. Checking her cell phone, she found a message from the Police Chief inviting her to dinner at some diner. “Is it really that hard to tell I don’t want to be around you human?” She said to the phone, glaring at the screen.

“And of course he was complaining that I didn’t run around wasting time last night. But now he wants me to have dinner with him.” Brushing her teeth, she rolled her eyes. “I hope he isn’t some old guy who goes after young girls.” Her pale skin turned slightly green. “Then again if he knew how useless he was he would leave me alone.”

So thirty minutes later she was approaching a small diner, the parking lot was half way full, and it looked busy inside. Dressed in a gray button up shirt covered by a black vest, her pants were black slacks, and she had dark sunglasses covering her sensitive eyes from the harsh glare of the sun. In the parking lot, several high school students were loitering, all wearing sport jackets.

“Woah ho ho.” One of the students exclaimed after he noticed her. “You new in town?” He stepped in her way trying to block her path with his larger size.

“Really barking up the wrong tree pal.” She answered, shouldering her way past him.

“Hey I was just tryin to be friendly, I just thought a pretty girl like you would like someone to show you round town?”

Ranma froze in her step and closed her eyes before slowly pulling off sunglasses to place in her pocket. “You thought?” She asked, casually turning to stare into the humans eyes. “You don’t think.” With deliberate steps, she approached him. “You saw a pretty girl and decided to make a pass at me. That wouldn’t be so bad if you actually listened when I said no.” Ranma finished by poking him in the chest with a finger.

The rest of the teens were snickering at their friend who was now frozen in spot, unable to stop looking into her eyes. “And I know exactly what you were thinking about me.” She whispered, her voice oozing disgust. Giving a last poke with her finger, she toppled him to fall to the concrete.

She really hated being able to read minds sometimes. Even being an amoral blood sucking demon, she still found some of the desires of humans when they thought about her body to be sickening. Returning her sunglasses to her nose, she entered the diner, leaving the boy to be ridiculed by his friends.

A dark skinned waitress approached quickly. “Only one?” She asked.

“I’m supposed to meet Mr. Sawn, the Police Chief.”

“Over here.” Said man’s voice called and Ranma saw that he was sitting at a corner table with the girl Ranma recognized from the vampire’s home.

“I’ll be over to get your order in a second.” The waitress was called over to another table.

Sitting down at the table, Ranma brushed some hair out of her face. ‘Of course he would have to choose one of the few spots that are getting direct sunlight.’ She glowered, keeping her arms out of the sunbeams streaming across the table.

“Looks like you need some more sleep.” Charlie was actually concerned. “And are you always so pale?”

“Usually I only work at night, so yes, I’m always this pale.” She answered.

“Do you always wear sunglasses too?” The girl asked thinking that she was being funny.

Removing her glasses, she set them on the table to look at the human out of the corner of her eye. “No.” It was gratifying to know that her eyes had taken the wind out of the girls sails. “Sometimes-- people have problems with my eye color.” Ranma stressed the word ‘people’ to see that the girl was putting things together slowly.

“It is unusual.” Charlie threw in.

“I like to think it’s rare.” Ranma smiled toothily, knowing that her type of vampire was a rarity in the world, an endangered species really.

“So what can I get for you?” The waitress from before asked, placing a glass over water in front of Ranma.

“Nothing.” Ranma waved her off.

“Alright.” The black woman didn’t press. “Are you two fine for now?”

“Yes.” Mr. Swan answered and the waitress moved off to another table.

“Are you just not hungry or-- do you-- not eat?” The girl asked.

“Bella can you wait five minutes before getting snarky?” Charlie rubbed a hand over his mustache. “This is my daughter Bella, and this is a Special Agent Ranma who’s helping with the murders, actually what is your last name?”

“Saotome.” She answered.

“But you’re so young.” Bella brought up. “How are you a-- Special Agent.”

“I’m twenty and I have special talents.”

To the left of Ranma an older man leaned back on his chair. “Does that mean you know what’s killing people?” He asked.

‘Keh, eavesdroppers.’ Ranma nodded to the man. “Yes I do, but since you’re a civilian I can’t discuss it with you.”

“I haven’t even heard the whole story yet Chuck.” Charlie told the man. “Perhaps when I’m done eating?”

“Might as well.” Ranma shrugged, and settled into her chair to watch a pair of humans eat.

[LawOhki]

Ranma let Charlie enter into his office in the police station before she purposely shut the door to lean against it. The man’s daughter had left in a beat up old red truck, and Ranma would have to track her down after this.

“I’ll explain this as simply as a can.” Ranma started, moving from the door to stand in front of the desk. “What kind of bite marks did you see on the bodies?”

“The forensics team said some resembled human ones.” Mr. Swan answered. “But they were wrong, more like blades.”

“They are right about that. What you’re looking for only looks like a human.” Ranma paused. “I could go into more detail but they are vampires.”

“That’s ridiculous.” Mr. Swan scoffed at her explanation. “Vampires don’t exist.”

“They do.” Holding up her right index finger and morphed it to be twice as long, completely black, and ending at a sharp point. “Normal guns will be useless against them, you can’t fight them physically, humans are for all purposes useless in this fight.”

Charlie stuttered, staring at her altered finger. “How-- what-- I don’t.”

“I’m a monster that hunts other monsters, Mr. Swan. There are at least three vampires who are making a buffet of your town. I have some leads that I need to follow up on, but I can’t do that if I keep having you BUTTING into my business.” Ranma pressed her finger into the top of the desk, easily pushing into the wood, and her eyes glowing a soft red.

“What are you?” He stammered.

“Isn’t it obvious?” She showed off her fangs with a large smile. “I’m a vampire as well. Forget any kind of fiction you may have read. We’re real and my organization has worked long and hard to make sure that humans like you live happy little lives thinking you’re the top of the food chain.”

“Say-- say I believe you.” The man was so frightened that Ranma reformed her finger and took a step away. “What happens since you told me?” Ranma had used a small amount of mental commanding to force him to accept vampires.

“You keep quiet, nobody would believe you anyways. This type of vampire specifically has a-- ruling body that would have you killed or made into one of them if you knew and started talking. I’ll need to talk to your daughter after this.”

“Bella? What does she have to do with this?” Charlie started to move past shocked acceptance and towards being able to work with this information.

“She’s involved with one of these vampires who are living outside of town. They claim to only feed off non-humans, but you saw the bodies, they don’t have control. Any blood might set them off into a frenzy.”

“The Cullens? But that doesn’t make any sense. Carlisle is a doctor, I’ve seen him work around blood. All his kids go to school and are around people all day.”

“Then you’ve been very lucky that one of them hasn’t slipped up and caused a massacre.”

“I should call her.” He reached for a phone on his desk and Ranma placed a hand on his to stop him.

“No, you’ll keep the secret. You don’t know if one of them is there listening, and that may force their hand.” She explained calmly, removing her hand. “They would kill her or she would become one.” She repeated her earlier comment.

“I’m not going to just sit by while my daughter is put in danger.” Charlie said firmly, clearly resolved to protect his child.

“Then let’s go to your house.” Ranma suggested, if the girl’s vampire friend was there, she could force either kill him or use him. It probably wasn’t very nice for her to use the teen as bait, but then again, she wasn’t very nice.

[Konsaki]

Holding up her right index finger and morphed it to be twice as long, completely black, and ending at a sharp point.

Remove last comma since it precedes an and.

Ranma pressed her finger into the top of the desk, easily pushing into the wood, and her eyes glowing a soft red.

Might want to change 'and' into 'while'. Also change the 'glowing' into 'glowed'.

Forget any kind of fiction you may have read.

This bit seems unneeded in Ranma's exposition.

Ranma had used a small amount of mental commanding to force him to accept vampires.

This seems more of an Author's Note that just had the brackets removed. Might want to rework it a little.

if the girl’s vampire friend was there, she could force either kill him or use him.

Missing a word or something...

[LawOhki]

“I’m hard to break, but you should probably worry about the speed limit.” Ranma commented at Charlie drove his cruiser nearly twice the posted speed limit. “Just a suggestion.”

“If you wanted me to be calm you shouldn’t have told me my daughter might be hanging out with a monster.” While making this declaration, the human did slow down and look over at her. “When did you change clothes?”

“I said I have many talents.” She answered, leaning back in the seat. Ranma was now dressed in her long black jacket, one pistol was holstered at the back of her blue jeans, and she had on a green turtleneck.

“So why am I supposed to trust you, aren’t you a vampire as well?”

“I’m not the same kind.”

“And now on top of vampires existing you’re going to tell me that there are different types?”

“Yes, and you can quit being so hysterical about it.” She snorted. “How do you think I felt when I first found out?” Ranma asked rhetorically.

“How should I know?” He called her on the question.

“Man you humans always think it’s bad when you find out that there are vampires.” Shaking her head, she knew humans were self-obsessed but it always came out when finding out about the supernatural world. “How do you think I felt waking up and finding out that I suddenly survived off blood?”

“Umm-- not good?”

“I didn’t even remember it happening and it was so hard to remember being human.” Ranma stared out of the windshield without focusing on anything. “Then I had to leave my family and move halfway across the world, followed by months to deal with the changes.”

“I-- had no idea.”

“So forgive me if I don’t care too much about your mental state.” Ranma glared darkly at the man through her sunglasses. The human didn’t answer her and he was actually feeling sorry for her.

“We’re here.” He informed her as they pulled into the driveway of a two story white house. A familiar old red truck was also parked in the driveway. “What do you want me to do?”

“Just a second.” Scanning the home with her extra senses, she found Swan’s daughter in an upstairs room, and a vampire there as well. “Don’t do anything but there is one here.”

“How can you tell?”

“Again, I have many talents.” Opening up the car door, she shut it without trying to hide the noise. Motioning with her hand, Charlie also got out of the vehicle. “I just need you to stay out of the way, find a spot to sit down in the bottom floor.” Reaching into her jacket she grabbed her other pistol, and handed it to him. “You probably won’t need it.”

“I already have a pistol and if I can get inside I have a double barrel shotgun.”

“Wouldn’t matter, that has special explosive rounds that will set him on fire. At which point you would really want to run. So just try and stay out of it if something happens.” Skipping up the steps, she opened the door.

“Um.” Charlie followed her in. “I’m home!” He called up the steps.

“Alright!” Bella’s voice called back.

With one last nervous glance, Charlie headed off away from the steps. Sneaking up the steps with a few silent hops, Ranma finally made noise by her shoes knocking on the wood floor. She didn’t even knock on the door to Bella’s room before entering. As expected, the vampire had realized that two people had entered, and was waiting for her. The teenager was back behind the vampire and using him as a shield.

“Can’t stay away from your meal can you?” Ranma smirked. “Does it make the kill better for you? Or do you just like to have that smell in your nose all the time?”

“You’re the one that came to the house.” The vampire didn’t seem threatened by Ranma but he was not relaxed.

“I have to admit it is a nice house.” Ranma shifted casually to put her weight on one leg and removed her sunglasses. The room was dark, with only two lights within paper lanterns for illumination.

“Red eyes, you feed from humans.” The male vampire commented right away. Ranma smirked, noticing that the vampire had a gold ring to his eyes.

“I have red eyes because that’s what my Sire had. But yes I occasionally splurge on a human. I’m sure you’ve had your share.” Ranma caught the wince from the other vampire. “There are a few things I want to know from you.”

Ranma didn’t have time to start asking questions before the vampire had shot across the room and grabbed her by the throat. Bring up her right arm, her fingers turned into blades, and she slashed at his arm with enough force to nearly cut through the limb in five spots. He hissed and released her to dart across the room to grab the girl and place her on his back before breaking through the window.

Shaking her head, Ranma followed the pair, and let her hand resume its prior shape. Unhindered by a human cargo, she easily kept up with the vampire who appeared to be concerned for the human. “I just wanted to talk.” She told him, appearing at his side. “But I’m having thoughts about doing something else.” The vampire slid to a stop and Ranma slammed on her own brakes briefly before bouncing several times to dissipate her speed.

“Bella stay behind me.” The vampire told the girl, getting into an aggressive crouch.

“Now you’re just being ridiculous.” Ranma ran a hand through her hair. She could see the other vampires arm healing up from the attack like cracks in stone coming back together. “Really if you want to fight, just to let you know, I’m not going to hold back.”

“Edward wait.” Bella begged the vampire, grabbing on to his injured arm. “Maybe you don’t have to fight.”

“I’d listen to her.” Ranma point towards the girl.

“Quiet Bella you don’t understand, she threatened my family, and she’ll probably kill you just for knowing.” Edward pushed Bella away.

“I’m just here to get the vampires that are killing humans.” Ranma held up both hands with the palms facing the vampire. “If that isn’t you Mr. Gold Eyes, I’m not going to kill you unless you make me, or you put me in a situation where I think that’s a good idea.”

Hearing twigs snapping and other noises that usually accompanied people running through a forest, Ranma glanced towards the nearby woods to see a group of five semi familiar vampires appear at the edge of the yard. “So you aren’t just all flesh and bone.” She mused, assuming that he had sent out some kind of mental call to the rest of his friends back at that house in the woods.

[frice2000]

I particularly enjoyed Ranma's musings, and your cuningly concealed authors commentary on how her species is endangered and how so very few Vampire stories now a days use the traditional vampire mythology. Made me laugh quite a bit. However, there are so many sources for traditional vampire mythology that's also funny that a more traditional Dracula style vampire is what were lamenting as that's very much a Bram Stoker creation with a bunch of folk tales mixed in. Still that was a cute scene.

What amazes me is that you're managing a compelling characterization on the Twilight characters. It must be killing you to write it wanting to slaughter them all. In all though I think you have it working out quite nicely and it'll be fun to read the conclusion chapters. Nice work.

[LawOhki]

I particularly enjoyed Ranma's musings, and your cuningly concealed authors commentary on how her species is endangered and how so very few Vampire stories now a days use the traditional vampire mythology. Made me laugh quite a bit. However, there are so many sources for traditional vampire mythology that's also funny that a more traditional Dracula style vampire is what were lamenting as that's very much a Bram Stoker creation with a bunch of folk tales mixed in. Still that was a cute scene.

What amazes me is that you're managing a compelling characterization on the Twilight characters. It must be killing you to write it wanting to slaughter them all. In all though I think you have it working out quite nicely and it'll be fun to read the conclusion chapters. Nice work.

Actually that was strictly Ranma feeling bad that if she wants to go meet new vampires, chances are they aren't going to be the same as her. There's only a handful of them compared to other types that can spread like a plague. But it could certainly be taken as a author commentary.

Yes it's killing me I'm so disgusted with twilight I'm my blood pressure is like about ready to explode. But coming up with Ranma's comments about having trouble early on has inspired me to write a flash back for the current main story chapter that deals with Ranma a couple days after arriving in London adjusting to the differences. Since originally I just skipped a full week and glossed over it.

[LawOhki]

Hearing twigs snapping and other noises that usually accompanied people running through a forest, Ranma glanced towards the nearby woods to see a group of five semi familiar vampires appear at the edge of the yard. “So you aren’t just all flesh and bone.” She mused, assuming that he had sent out some kind of mental call to the rest of his friends back at that house in the woods. Glancing back in the other direction, she noticed that Charlie had grabbed a rifle, clearly forgetting what she had said about those being worthless.

“Bella get over here right now.” Charlie demanded, storming out the back door of his house with his rifle ready.

“Dad wait!” Bella took off towards her father in a jog. “This isn’t want it looks like.” Edward followed after her until Charlie pointed his rifle at him.

“Stay away from my daughter vampire.” The man demanded. Ranma could feel the murderous intent from the vampire and the possessive attitude he had.

Ranma reached Edward before he could attack Charlie and grabbed on to his shoulder. Kicking in the back of his knee, she pulled him down towards the ground with enough force to make a deep indent in the grass. Planting a foot on Edward’s neck she held him in place with his legs trapped beneath him.

Turning to Charlie, she narrowed her eyes. “Get back inside and take her with you.” The human nodded and grabbed Bella by the arm to drag inside even though she struggled.

Before the two were inside, Ranma was surrounded by the family of vampires. ‘Damn they are pretty quick.’ She thought before she was pulled from Edward by the big muscular one who threw her across the grass. Landing on her back, she slid briefly before rolling backwards, and up to her feet in a crouch. A manic smile spread across her face, looking forward to fighting these lesser vampires. They weren’t slouches when it came to strength and speed and she was interested in seeing what other surprises there might be.

“You shouldn’t have involved him.” The blond female said in a huff. “Don’t you realize what you’ve done?”

Standing up to her full height, she straightened out her jacket. “Don’t act like you care what happens to humans.” She gave off a brief derisive laugh. Glancing towards the house, she saw that Charlie and Bella were finally inside. “And personally I’d rather they all knew and I don’t much care for your rules.”

“Why did you tell him?” Edward snarled, storming towards her.

“Cause he asked.” She answered, staring him down as he came up close to tower over her. Ranma could feel the anger rolling off the lesser vampire.

“You’re trying to take her from me!” He gave off an inarticulate cry of rage and attempted to punch her in the face. Leaning backwards at the waist, his attack missed, and she straightened up in time with his fist receding.

“I got nothing against vampire human relations.” Ranma smirked catching the rest of the vampires moving up to flank Edward, and the brunette female step between them.

“All this is unneeded.” The woman put a hand on Edward’s cheek. “Calm down, she’s trying to provoke you.” Ranma raised her right hand and held her index finger slightly away from her thumb. Edward stared at her with a look of complete hatred.

“So how did you all know to track down loverboy?” Ranma was interested in that. Teleportation would be required for them to have reached this location if they had come from the home she had visited the other night.

“I saw that the vampires you are looking for will go after Bella.” Alice, the short vampire supplied. “And I saw that Bella would tell Edward about you before you would show up.”

“See the future kind of stuff?” Ranma was impressed. Sometimes she got feelings about the future but Ceres could occasionally see real visions.

“We want to help you find them before they do that.” The big muscular added.

“After that we want you to leave.” The blonde finished.

Ranma being charged up and ready for a good fight stared at the woman while debating her options. The obvious one was to simply kill them all and finish her job without their help. She wanted that one the most. Then again, this was what she had been hoping to get here, extra eyes that didn’t have to sleep.

“So you can’t simply see where the vampires are?” Ranma asked Alice.

“No, but it will be tomorrow around midday that we meet up with them.”

“I guess I’ll work with you then.” Ranma shrugged casually. “But isn’t there one more of you?”

“Carlisle is at work and couldn’t come.” The brunette answered.

“Midday, ugh-- why can’t it be midnight?” Ranma looked up to the sky to be briefly blinded by the sun. “Deal.”

“Deal.” Alice shot back.

“I need to go talk to Bella.” Edward said and immediately set off for the house.

“You should listen to the girl’s father.” Ranma sprinted past the vampire. The look on his face that she once again got between him and the girl.

“She’s old enough to make her own decisions.” He growled.

“I’m going in there to discuss things with my-- coworker, who isn’t too fond of you right now. So if you’re really interested in that girl. You’re going to head back with your friends.” Ranma pointed towards the group who was poised for another altercation. Edward stared at her again with complete hatred. She could bathe in the jealousy and rage that was rolling off of him.

“Fine.” He spat, running off towards the woods with the rest of his group.

Ranma shook her head. “I may have to kill them just for being so annoying.”

Charlie opened the door for her as she entered; Bella was behind him, her eyes slightly red from tears. “They gone?” He asked.

“For now.” Ranma answered with a shrug, earning a slap from the girl.

“Who are you to stop me from seeing Edward?” Bella demanded.

“Bella go sit down in the front room.” Mr. Swan ordered.

“No dad, who is she to--.”

“I said sit down in the front room.” Charlie said firmly. Bella looked at her father like she wanted to complain more before going into the front room with a huff.

“Did you forget what I told you?” Ranma looked at the father like he was an idiot. “Where’s the gun I gave you?”

“It’s right here.” Charlie walked away to the front room and grabbed the pistol sitting on a table to give to her.

“You better forget about vampires for five minutes or you’re going to be dead in about five minutes.” Ranma placed the weapon in a pocket. Without asking for permission, she sat down on a reclining chair, and kicked her legs out. “This place got a basement? I’d like to get some sleep.”

“I’m going to need a drink.” Charlie ignored her question to head for the kitchen. “Maybe more than one.” Ranma tracked the man till he was out of sight.

“And I suppose you want to become one of them.” Ranma ignored the death glare she was receiving. She didn’t even need to read the girl’s mind to see what she was after.

“So-- so what if I do?” She squirmed in her seat uncomfortably.

“I think you’re the first human I ever met who would want to be turned.” Ranma cocked her head to the side. “All your friends out there may look pretty, may claim to only eat animal blood, as if it makes them better. But deep down, what makes them tick, what drives everything they do, is to kill.” Ranma hit the lever to recline the chair.

“I should get me one of these.” She stretched out. “Need some black out curtains for here though.”

“You’re just trying to get me to stop seeing him.”

Charlie returned with a can of beer and sat down next to his daughter. “How could you be so irresponsible?” Somehow the human hadn’t heard about Bella’s desire to be a vampire.

“Dad you don’t understand. Edward’s different, he loves me, and he would never do anything to hurt me.” The girl said with complete seriousness. Ranma didn’t think she was lying, from Bella’s point of view, Edward probably did love her.

“So do you have a basement? Or someplace where the sun doesn’t reach?” Ranma asked the Police Chief. She didn’t care if this girl wanted to get turned into a vampire, she didn’t care if she wanted to risk her life for a relationship with a type of vampire who could barely control themselves. The sun wouldn’t be down for a few more hours and she wanted to make up for lost sleep.

“There’s a guest room upstairs.” Charlie took a long drink from his beer. “I’ll show you where.”

“Thanks.” She followed him up the steps and to a room with dust on most of the furniture.

“Sorry, the last time someone stayed here was a few years ago, and I’m not a great house keeper.”

Drawing the shades closed and being satisfied she threw back the covers on the twin bed. “I’ll live.” She joked to herself.

“Thanks-- ya know-- for protecting my daughter.”

“Don’t thank me.” Ranma took off her jacket to hang on the endboard. “I really don’t care what happens to her.” About to get in and pull the covers up over her head, Ranma heard a truck engine come to life right outside the home.

“Bella!” Charlie ran from the room.

Ranma waited, rubbing at her temples. ‘Please tell me she didn’t run away. Please tell me she didn’t run away.’ The frantic footsteps running back up the steps told her what she needed to know.

“Bella just drove off.” Charlie informed her.

“Unbelievable.”

[frice2000]

The human nodded and grabbed Bella by the arm to drag inside even though she struggled.

Awkward sentence. What about something like 'He nodded and forced the struggling Bella back inside.'

“And personally I’d rather they all knew and I don’t much care for your rules.”

Couple things odd about that statement. You're saying Ranma would like the whole world to know about the existence of vampires or just those involved in there affairs. If it is all humans in general that's a suicidal idea at best as I doubt even the Hellsing vampires would be able to deal with millions of humans attempting to end their lives.

In regards to the quote itself I think it needs to be changed sounds strange. You kind of need to get rid of the 'and' it sounds silly. Maybe break it into two sentences or combine it another way. I could see it as two sentences with her laughing about their 'rules'.

Teleportation would be required for them to have reached this location if they had come from the home she had visited the other night.

I think you can cut that whole sentence a bit. Just needed her wondering if they could teleport.

The big muscular added.

insert 'one' after muscular.

“So you can’t simply see where the vampires are?” Ranma asked Alice.

I'd have her rephrase that to something like, 'So you can't see the present only the future?'. Or 'Can't just tell me where they are now?'. Either of those makes more sense since Ranma is wondering about their powers in general.

The look on his face that she once again got between him and the girl.

Missing a word here on what emotion you're going for. I assume its anger but it's not stated.

Charlie ignored her question to head for the kitchen.

Wonderful parenting on exhibition here. I really wonder what Miss Myers upbringing was like because she writes parental figures like total morons.

is to kill.” Ranma hit the lever to recline the chair.

You could really make that statement better. Maybe the 'desire, the need to kill.' And then have a contented or whimsical expression on her face. What I picture when a vampire who is unapologetic about being a vampire is describing that desire that she gets a contemplative possibly hungry look on her face which you could easily use to make Bella think she is threatening her. You're trying to make it like she doesn't care at all about the humans in this situation but she's obviously slightly interested even if its purely as a psychological case study. A threat that requires next to no effort would be welcome here. Gives the conversation a lot more value and also gives little Bella something to consider about the life she wants so badly at the ripe old age of 17. Hell I think if she used any effort at all here she could scare the little girl away from the whole vampire life destroying little emo vamp Edward and breaking his 'heart'. Resulting in pathetic fight scene with Ranma for destroying his relationship with her. Would be very gratifying if Edward killed Bella in his rage at her becoming afraid of him after seeing the monster that is hiding underneath the sparkles and allure of immortality from Ranma's discussion with her.

“Unbelievable.”

Just describe the emotion there. I mean if it's irritation that would be nice to know about or if its ambivalence that works too but right now I have no idea. Part of your narrative makes me think she cares a little bit or is amused with Bella another part makes me think she's irritated with the whole situation.

Anyway, nice job though I'm still anxious for the ganking to get started. Major kudos to you for making these characters interesting though that can't be easy. I don't understand why you're writing this at this pace. It can't be good for your stress level. However, I guess once you have Ranma killing them all painfully and brutally you'll have a huge contented smile on your face so that may be why you're torturing yourself now.

Oh and on a side note listen to this song: March of Cambreadth when you're writing the death scenes. It started randomly playing while reading this bit and it made me amped for death scenes.

[LawOhki]

Couple things odd about that statement. You're saying Ranma would like the whole world to know about the existence of vampires or just those involved in there affairs. If it is all humans in general that's a suicidal idea at best as I doubt even the Hellsing vampires would be able to deal with millions of humans attempting to end their lives.

That's the implication, for the world to know. Ranma would like to quit hiding and coexist in the open. This will actually come up in the main story when Ranma is forced to do just that and won't like it too much.

You could really make that statement better. Maybe the 'desire, the need to kill.' And then have a contented or whimsical expression on her face. What I picture when a vampire who is unapologetic about being a vampire is describing that desire that she gets a contemplative possibly hungry look on her face which you could easily use to make Bella think she is threatening her. You're trying to make it like she doesn't care at all about the humans in this situation but she's obviously slightly interested even if its purely as a psychological case study. A threat that requires next to no effort would be welcome here. Gives the conversation a lot more value and also gives little Bella something to consider about the life she wants so badly at the ripe old age of 17. Hell I think if she used any effort at all here she could scare the little girl away from the whole vampire life destroying little emo vamp Edward and breaking his 'heart'. Resulting in pathetic fight scene with Ranma for destroying his relationship with her. Would be very gratifying if Edward killed Bella in his rage at her becoming afraid of him after seeing the monster that is hiding underneath the sparkles and allure of immortality from Ranma's discussion with her.

I'll throw in a bit more, but I kind of wanted it to be a very quick thing since Charlie is just right around the corner, and Ranma's saying it for Bella's ears not his.

Bella's basically decided that Ranma is some other type of vampire, and that Edward isn't like that. So nothing Ranma will say is going to get through to her.

And Ranma really doesn't care about Bella. This is long past the events of the last and current chapter of the main story. So unless Ranma does know someone personally and spends a great deal of time around her, she doesn't care. That's just how vampires are.

Just describe the emotion there. I mean if it's irritation that would be nice to know about or if its ambivalence that works too but right now I have no idea. Part of your narrative makes me think she cares a little bit or is amused with Bella another part makes me think she's irritated with the whole situation.

Ranma was curious, but now that she's spent a little time around Bella, she's more or less just annoyed by the attitude, and maybe considering having her for a meal.

[LawOhki]

Ranma was not happy.

Normally this was not a terribly bad thing, she was a reasonable vampire, and venting her frustration on unsuspecting or even suspecting humans was not something she would normally consider. Having caught up with the red truck of Bella Swan by flying as a bat, she had reformed to sit with her back against the cab in a cross legged position with her arms crossed. Now she was thinking seriously about eating the girl.

It had been a chore to convince Mr. Swan not to go off in pursuit. She could understand him being worried about his daughter, and how it was hard to realize just how useless he was, but she couldn’t be dealing with that on top of everything else.

Closing her eyes, she stretched out with her mind, focusing on the engine and its many parts. Tracing Bella’s foot to the accelerator, she followed it to a weak point, and broke it. Bella cursed and tried to pump the pedal before finally being forced to the side of the road. The human girl got out and slammed the door shut to lean against the side. Bella had been driving down a private road that must lead up to the Cullen’s home, so no cars would be coming by soon.

“Problems?” Ranma startled the girl and then chuckled. Hopping over the side of the truck bed, she landed lightly to face the taller female. “Don’t you care about your dad?”

“Don’t bring him into this. You wouldn’t understand. Me and Edward-- we need each other.” Bella took several steps back.

“You can’t spend a day away from him?” Ranma looked at the human with disgust. “I know people like you, it’s not healthy.” She was being unfair to Ukyo and Shampoo, they may have loved her at one point, but they weren’t dependent on her, and they both had lives that kept them from regularly interacting with her. Honestly Akane had been more dependent than either of those two.

Ranma stared right into the girl’s eyes and took a single step towards her. “At first you were a curiosity.” Bella took a step away and Ranma took another forward. “Humans and vampires being together isn’t that strange and I would actually hope it works out.” Ranma narrowed her eyes. “But now I know that you have no clue what you’re doing or the world you’re trying to play in because it’s exciting.”

“I love him.” Bella defended herself.

“Do you really?” Ranma snapped her hand forward and grabbed Bella back the back of her hair and dragged her down to be beneath Ranma’s eye level. “You have a stupid way of showing it!” Baring her fangs, she squeezed too tightly.

“St- stop it, you’re hurting me!” Bella pleaded.

“Listen you stupid human. I’m here to hunt down and kill off vampires who are a threat to people. You are making him a threat.” Releasing the girl, she fell to the dirt road with a pained yelp. Reaching into her pocket, Ranma pulled out her cell phone. “What’s your home number?”

“Edward will kill you for touching me.” Bella spit on Ranma’s jacket. For a brief moment her eyes glowed.

“What is your home phone number.” Ranma commanded, staring deeply into the girl’s eyes. There was a brief struggle but Bella gave it to her quickly enough. “Charlie, your daughter’s truck is stalled out on the road to the Cullen’s house. A bolt holding the gas pedal to something else has come loose. Shouldn’t be that hard to fix. But you should come and pick Bella up.” Without waiting for a response, she ended the call.

“Stop trying to tell me what to do!” Bella succeeded in punching her in the nose. Ranma allowed the cartilage to be broken. When Bella’s fist was pulled away and she could see the damage, Ranma simply healed it back to new.

“If you do that again, you’ll find out what becoming a real vampire’s meal is like.” Ranma said evenly and without emotion. She gave Bella no time to complain before she knocked the girl out with a well placed attack to the head. Catching the body before it could fall to the ground like a ragdoll, she shoved the girl roughly in the truck.

[Konsaki]

“But now I know that you have no clue what you’re doing or the world you’re trying to play in because it’s exciting.”

The first half is okay, but the second half seems off. It's either missing punctuation or something else.

[frice2000]

“Edward will kill you for touching me.”

Heh...it's nice that she loves him sooo much that she is willing to put his life in jeopardy because someone offended her. What a shitty shallow pathetic character. Nice work here looks like the deaths are coming soon. I liked Ranma's interaction with her there. I do think you're slightly underestimating what a human could accomplish against them though. Given time to set up, a high powered sniper rifle with the bullets you described and enough planning I think humans could take them out easily enough. But regardless of my sentiments on that nice work here.

[kitsunepotter]

isn't the Hellsing Organization set up for that purpose, bunch of soldiers and two (three if you include Walter) tump cards just incase? (it's far more complex than that but thats the jest of it.) anyways this is far better than other Hellsing/Twilight crossover I have seen. (curently 30 on ff.net) you given each character a personality which allows us to actually know why we hate them (sparkly 'vegitarian' vampires aside) and so makes it a more personable kill which causes more cheer. Wonderful so far and I can't wait for it to be finished.